A reader of this blog submitted this question to the blog, for your consideration.
QUESTION OF THE DAY
"Given the fact that philandering "Judge" Collier has been involved in a longstanding sordid sexual relationship with his mistress and court reporter Donna Garrity, unlike his numerous prior affairs, why doesn't he just divorce his second wife and marry Garrity?"
BEST ANSWER
Although the blogger cannot know what is in LAPDOG COLLIER'S feeble mind, there is no definitive answer, unless LAPDOG comes forward with his own explanation and answer. One can only guess as to his long-term plans and motives.
There is, however, an old adage which certainly applies in this situation:
"WHY BUY THE COW WHEN THE MILK IS FREE?"
Wednesday, March 18, 2015
Sunday, March 15, 2015
THE MYSERY OF THE ELUSIVE WOODPECKER DEEPENS !
Regular readers of this blog may recall that the blogger was the first to report that wildlife officers have been alerted to the presumptive presence of an elusive woodpecker in the Medina County Courthouse, Mosque &Railroad Station based upon the discovery of identical pecker tracks on the desks of illegitimate "judge" LAPDOG "PUBLIUS" COLLIER and LAPDOG'S COURT REPORTER, MISTRESS, AND MAIN SQUEEZE DONNA "HAVE IT YOUR WAY" GARRITY. For further details, readers can consult a prior post at this blog captioned WILDLIFE OFFICERS ON HIGH ALERT ! easily found at http://medinacorruption.blogspot.com/2015/03/wildlife-officers-on-high-alert.html
UPDATE ON THE ELUSIVE WOODPECKER
Wildlife officers have been on high alert for sightings of the elusive woodpecker reported to have taken up residence in the Medina County Courthouse, Mosque & Railroad Station since the time that a custodial crew reported finding mysterious pecker tracks on LAPDOG COLLIER'S desk, as well as upon the desk of DONNA "HAVE IT YOUR WAY" GARRITY, whose office is located adjacent to LAPDOG COLLIER'S KANGAROO COURTROOM #1.
A comprehensive search of the Medina County Courthouse, Mosque & Railroad Station failed to identify just where the elusive woodpecker had concealed itself.
Wildlife officers, however, were quick to react to two anonymous tips then thought to lead to the discovery and capture of the elusive woodpecker, presumptively an endangered species (as difficult as that may be to believe).
THE FIRST ANONYMOUS TIP
The first anonymous caller dialed 9-1-1to report that DONNA "HAVE IT YOUR WAY" GARRITY had recently purchased a large bottle of RIPPLE wine at Buehler's Market for the princely sum of $1.29. The anonymous caller reported that, when checking out, GARRITY said to the cashier, "There is nothing better to cleanse the palate to remove the bitter aftertaste of pecker from your mouth than a tall glass of Ripple."
The caller recalled that mysterious pecker tracks had been reported on LAPDOG "PUBLIUS" COLLIER'S desk and put two and two together, prompting to 9-1-1 call to the Medina County Sheriff's Office.
THE SECOND ANONYMOUS TIP
Shortly after the first anonymous tip, a second anonymous caller reported that a large number of pecker tracks could be found within the residence of DONNA "HAVE IT YOUR WAY" GARRITY.
THE "INVESTIGATION"
Upon receipt of the second anonymous call, in short order after the first, it was time to panic. The sheriff's dispatcher dispatched all available cars to GARRITY'S home, where they closed off the road to all traffic and established a perimeter around the house.
Three sheriff's deputies, armed with automatic assault rifles, "concealed" themselves in the trees surrounding "HAVE IT YOUR WAY" GARRITY'S home.
Soon after establishing the perimeter, one of the sharp-eyed deputies observed LAPDOG "PUBLIUS" COLLIER enter his auto parked in GARRITY'S driveway. The radio crackled when the deputy asked, "Where did he come from?" Another deputy could be heard on the radio, "Should we stop him?" The Sergeant in charge of this operation was quick to respond, "NO! Forget you ever saw him here. Nothing in your report about that."
As soon as wildlife officers arrived on scene, the sheriff's deputies prepared to assault the GARRITY residence. No search warrant is necessary in Medina County. CORRUPT MEDINA COUNTY PROSECUTOR DINO HOEMAN and LAPDOG "PUBLIUS" COLLIER did away with all of those constitutional niceties long ago in Medina County.
Given both of the anonymous tips called into the sheriff's office, sheriff's deputies fully believed that LAPDOG COLLIER and "HAVE IT YOUR WAY" GARRITY intended to barbeque the elusive woodpecker.
As the sheriff's deputies crept closer to GARRITY'S home, the Sergeant in command spied smoke rising from GARRITY'S barbeque gas grill. Investigating further in an attempt to determine whether LAPDOG COLLIER and "HAVE IT YOUR WAY" GARRITY had been barbecuing the elusive woodpecker, the Sergeant placed his hand on the hood of the grill to determine the temperature. HE SUFFERED THIRD-DEGREE BURNS TO HIS GUN HAND!
When the sheriff's Sergeant let out a HOWL, the other deputies mistook it for the signal to assault and blew through GARRITY'S doors, front and rear.
GARRITY, clad only in a sheer Victoria's Secret negligee, was startled, to say the least. She retreated into her bedroom and covered herself with one of LAPDOG COLLIER'S long-sleeved dress shirts.
Sheriff's deputies did a quick sweep of the house and discovered a half-empty bottle of Ripple, just as the anonymous caller had said.
Wildlife officers then questioned GARRITY about her activities on that date. GARRITY firmly denied that she had anything to do with the elusive woodpecker. One of the sheriff's deputies, convinced of GARRITY'S guilt without any supporting evidence (a daily occurrence in Medina County) asked her cynically, "How was the taste of the pecker?"
GARRITY never budged from her story. She consistently denied that she had tasted any pecker on that date, but admitted that she and LAPDOG COLLIER had shared the salami shortly before he left.
Deputies conducted a thorough five-minute search of "HAVE IT YOUR" GARRITY'S house and grounds but found no sign of the elusive woodpecker, not even a single feather.
THE MYSTERY OF THE ELUSIVE WOODPECKER GOES ON!
UPDATE ON THE ELUSIVE WOODPECKER
Wildlife officers have been on high alert for sightings of the elusive woodpecker reported to have taken up residence in the Medina County Courthouse, Mosque & Railroad Station since the time that a custodial crew reported finding mysterious pecker tracks on LAPDOG COLLIER'S desk, as well as upon the desk of DONNA "HAVE IT YOUR WAY" GARRITY, whose office is located adjacent to LAPDOG COLLIER'S KANGAROO COURTROOM #1.
A comprehensive search of the Medina County Courthouse, Mosque & Railroad Station failed to identify just where the elusive woodpecker had concealed itself.
Wildlife officers, however, were quick to react to two anonymous tips then thought to lead to the discovery and capture of the elusive woodpecker, presumptively an endangered species (as difficult as that may be to believe).
THE FIRST ANONYMOUS TIP
The first anonymous caller dialed 9-1-1to report that DONNA "HAVE IT YOUR WAY" GARRITY had recently purchased a large bottle of RIPPLE wine at Buehler's Market for the princely sum of $1.29. The anonymous caller reported that, when checking out, GARRITY said to the cashier, "There is nothing better to cleanse the palate to remove the bitter aftertaste of pecker from your mouth than a tall glass of Ripple."
The caller recalled that mysterious pecker tracks had been reported on LAPDOG "PUBLIUS" COLLIER'S desk and put two and two together, prompting to 9-1-1 call to the Medina County Sheriff's Office.
THE SECOND ANONYMOUS TIP
Shortly after the first anonymous tip, a second anonymous caller reported that a large number of pecker tracks could be found within the residence of DONNA "HAVE IT YOUR WAY" GARRITY.
THE "INVESTIGATION"
Upon receipt of the second anonymous call, in short order after the first, it was time to panic. The sheriff's dispatcher dispatched all available cars to GARRITY'S home, where they closed off the road to all traffic and established a perimeter around the house.
Three sheriff's deputies, armed with automatic assault rifles, "concealed" themselves in the trees surrounding "HAVE IT YOUR WAY" GARRITY'S home.
Soon after establishing the perimeter, one of the sharp-eyed deputies observed LAPDOG "PUBLIUS" COLLIER enter his auto parked in GARRITY'S driveway. The radio crackled when the deputy asked, "Where did he come from?" Another deputy could be heard on the radio, "Should we stop him?" The Sergeant in charge of this operation was quick to respond, "NO! Forget you ever saw him here. Nothing in your report about that."
As soon as wildlife officers arrived on scene, the sheriff's deputies prepared to assault the GARRITY residence. No search warrant is necessary in Medina County. CORRUPT MEDINA COUNTY PROSECUTOR DINO HOEMAN and LAPDOG "PUBLIUS" COLLIER did away with all of those constitutional niceties long ago in Medina County.
Given both of the anonymous tips called into the sheriff's office, sheriff's deputies fully believed that LAPDOG COLLIER and "HAVE IT YOUR WAY" GARRITY intended to barbeque the elusive woodpecker.
As the sheriff's deputies crept closer to GARRITY'S home, the Sergeant in command spied smoke rising from GARRITY'S barbeque gas grill. Investigating further in an attempt to determine whether LAPDOG COLLIER and "HAVE IT YOUR WAY" GARRITY had been barbecuing the elusive woodpecker, the Sergeant placed his hand on the hood of the grill to determine the temperature. HE SUFFERED THIRD-DEGREE BURNS TO HIS GUN HAND!
When the sheriff's Sergeant let out a HOWL, the other deputies mistook it for the signal to assault and blew through GARRITY'S doors, front and rear.
GARRITY, clad only in a sheer Victoria's Secret negligee, was startled, to say the least. She retreated into her bedroom and covered herself with one of LAPDOG COLLIER'S long-sleeved dress shirts.
Sheriff's deputies did a quick sweep of the house and discovered a half-empty bottle of Ripple, just as the anonymous caller had said.
Wildlife officers then questioned GARRITY about her activities on that date. GARRITY firmly denied that she had anything to do with the elusive woodpecker. One of the sheriff's deputies, convinced of GARRITY'S guilt without any supporting evidence (a daily occurrence in Medina County) asked her cynically, "How was the taste of the pecker?"
GARRITY never budged from her story. She consistently denied that she had tasted any pecker on that date, but admitted that she and LAPDOG COLLIER had shared the salami shortly before he left.
Deputies conducted a thorough five-minute search of "HAVE IT YOUR" GARRITY'S house and grounds but found no sign of the elusive woodpecker, not even a single feather.
THE MYSTERY OF THE ELUSIVE WOODPECKER GOES ON!
Friday, March 13, 2015
HOEMAN/BAXTER TEAM CONFIRMS MEDINA REPUBLICRATS IMMUNE FROM FELONY PROSECUTION
SLEAZY ERIE COUNTY PROSECUTOR KEVIN BAXTER, WHO HAS HAD ONE OR MORE SEXUAL ENCOUNTERS WITH A WITNESS PRIOR TO A HOMICIDE TRIAL AMONG OTHER THINGS, HAS ADMITTED THAT, BY PRIOR AGREEMENT WITH CORRUPT MEDINA PROSECUTOR DINO HOEMAN, ALL MEDINA COUNTY REPUBLICRAT OFFICE HOLDERS HAVE BEEN GRANTED IMMUNITY FROM FELONY PROSECUTION. PRESUMABLE THAT IMMUNITY EXTENDS TO SUCH OFFENSES AS BURGLARY (MARK WHITFIELD) AND HOMICIDE.
BAXTER, WHO IS REPUTED TO HAVE PROVIDED A LOVE NEST IN CLEVELAND FOR ONE OF HIS SEX SLAVES, AT TAXPAYERS' EXPENSE, CONFIRMED REPUBLICRAT IMMUNITY FROM FELONY PROSECUTION IN A STATEMENT TO THE MEDINA GASSETTE.
FOR BACKGROUND INFORMATION ON BAXTER, SEE THE PRIOR POST AT THIS BLOG CAPTIONED ERIE COUNTY PROSECUTOR KEVIN BAXTER RETURNS TO MEDINA COUNTY; IN SEARCH OF NEW SEX SLAVE? easily found at http://medinacorruption.blogspot.com/2012/02/erie-county-prosecutor-kevin-baxter.html
BAXTER OFFERED THE FOLLOWING STATEMENT TO THE MEDINA GASSETTE PUBLISHED ON FEBRUARY 11, 2015.
The entire Gassette article can be found at http://medinagazette.northcoastnow.com/2015/02/11/2-commissioners-vs-auditor-email-fuels-medina-county-feud/
ONLY STEVE HAMBLEY BELIEVES THAT HOEMAN IS AN "HONEST GUY," WHICH CERTAINLY SPEAKS TO HAMBLEY'S MENTAL STATE, OR LACK THEREOF.
BAXTER, WHO IS REPUTED TO HAVE PROVIDED A LOVE NEST IN CLEVELAND FOR ONE OF HIS SEX SLAVES, AT TAXPAYERS' EXPENSE, CONFIRMED REPUBLICRAT IMMUNITY FROM FELONY PROSECUTION IN A STATEMENT TO THE MEDINA GASSETTE.
FOR BACKGROUND INFORMATION ON BAXTER, SEE THE PRIOR POST AT THIS BLOG CAPTIONED ERIE COUNTY PROSECUTOR KEVIN BAXTER RETURNS TO MEDINA COUNTY; IN SEARCH OF NEW SEX SLAVE? easily found at http://medinacorruption.blogspot.com/2012/02/erie-county-prosecutor-kevin-baxter.html
BAXTER OFFERED THE FOLLOWING STATEMENT TO THE MEDINA GASSETTE PUBLISHED ON FEBRUARY 11, 2015.
"Back in the ‘90s, Burke got misdemeanor charges, Wadsworth got misdemeanor charges, we’ve handled it pretty consistently,” Baxter said. “I guess the other politicians who are objecting right now aren’t looking at it consistently.”TRANSLATION : IF YOU ARE A MEDINA REPUBLICRAT OFFICE HOLDER, NOT TO WORRY. NO FELONY PROSECUTIONS FOR YOU.
The entire Gassette article can be found at http://medinagazette.northcoastnow.com/2015/02/11/2-commissioners-vs-auditor-email-fuels-medina-county-feud/
ONLY STEVE HAMBLEY BELIEVES THAT HOEMAN IS AN "HONEST GUY," WHICH CERTAINLY SPEAKS TO HAMBLEY'S MENTAL STATE, OR LACK THEREOF.
Monday, March 9, 2015
WEASELPECKER CAUGHT ON CAMERA !
Late one night recently, CNN announced that a WEASELPECKER had been caught on camera. When he heard the announcer state that a WEASELPECKER has been caught on camera, naturally the blogger's thoughts turned immediately to LAPDOG "PUBLIUS" COLLIER.
What could it possibly mean? How could someone catch the WEASELPECKER on camera? Did someone inadvertently stumble onto LAPDOG "PUBLIUS" COLLIER in the sack with his COURT REPORTER, MISTRESS, AND MAIN SQUEEZE DONNA "HAVE IT YOUR WAY GARRITY? Even more, did someone actually capture an image of LAPDOG and "HAVE IT YOUR WAY" GARRITY doing whatever they do to sexually gratify one another, as repulsive a thought as that may be?
That, of course, was a perfectly logical assumption given all the PECKER TRACKS found on LAPDOG COLLIER'S desk and the desk of LAPDOG'S COURT REPORTER, MISTRESS, AND MAIN SQUEEZE, DONNA "HAVE IT YOUR WAY" GARRITY.
Following the commercial, CNN broadcast the photo of the WEASELPECKER. The blogger was shocked at the photo!
This presents a wonderful opportunity for you, the reader, to test your knowledge of current events.
PRESENTED BELOW ARE TWO PHOTOS. CAN YOU PICK OUT THE WEASELPECKER?
YOU ARE CORRECT, NO MATTER WHICH, OR BOTH, OF THE PICTURE(S) YOU MAY HAVE SELECTED!
CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR ASTUTE AWARENESS OF CURRENT EVENTS!
What could it possibly mean? How could someone catch the WEASELPECKER on camera? Did someone inadvertently stumble onto LAPDOG "PUBLIUS" COLLIER in the sack with his COURT REPORTER, MISTRESS, AND MAIN SQUEEZE DONNA "HAVE IT YOUR WAY GARRITY? Even more, did someone actually capture an image of LAPDOG and "HAVE IT YOUR WAY" GARRITY doing whatever they do to sexually gratify one another, as repulsive a thought as that may be?
That, of course, was a perfectly logical assumption given all the PECKER TRACKS found on LAPDOG COLLIER'S desk and the desk of LAPDOG'S COURT REPORTER, MISTRESS, AND MAIN SQUEEZE, DONNA "HAVE IT YOUR WAY" GARRITY.
Following the commercial, CNN broadcast the photo of the WEASELPECKER. The blogger was shocked at the photo!
This presents a wonderful opportunity for you, the reader, to test your knowledge of current events.
PRESENTED BELOW ARE TWO PHOTOS. CAN YOU PICK OUT THE WEASELPECKER?
YOU ARE CORRECT, NO MATTER WHICH, OR BOTH, OF THE PICTURE(S) YOU MAY HAVE SELECTED!
CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR ASTUTE AWARENESS OF CURRENT EVENTS!
Friday, March 6, 2015
CORRUPT MEDINA COUNTY PROSECUTOR AND ILLEGITIMATE "JUDGE" LAPDOG "PUBLIUS" COLLIER CONTINUE TO CONCEAL THEIIR MISCONDUCT FROM FULL PUBLIC VIEW
CORRUPT MEDINA COUNTY PROSECUTOR DINO HOEMAN AND ILLEGITIMATE MEDINA "JUDGE" LAPDOG "PUBLIUS" COLLIER ARE AT IT AGAIN, TRYING TO CONCEAL AND COVER UP THEIR MISCONDUCT FROM PUBLIC VIEW.
Regular readers of this blog may recall that the innocent man, railroaded at trial and whose convictions at trial WERE TWICE REVERSED ON APPEAL BY THE COURT OF APPEALS BECAUSE OF PROSECUTORIAL AND JUDICIAL MISCONDUCT, FACILITATED BY ILLEGITIMATE "JUDGE" LAPDOG "PUBLIUS" COLLIER AND RICHARD (THE) "DICK" MARKUS, CHIEF AMONG MORONS, had supoenaed Internet Service Providers to determine the the true identity of "PUBLIUS" to a certainty.
Readers will recall that none of the subpoenaed Internet Service Providers responded or furnished the subpoenaed records. The failure of the Internet Service Providers to furnish any records at all in response to a court-issued subpoena is highly unusual.
Readers can refresh by reading a prior post at this blog captioned WHO, OTHER THAN CORRUPT MEDINA COUNTY PROSECUTOR DINO HOEMAN AND ILLEGITIMATE MEDINA judge LAPDOG "PUBLIUS" COLLIER, HAD REASON TO OBSTRUCT PRODUCTION OF SUBPOENAED RECORDS FROM INTERNET SERVICE PROVIDERS??? easily found at this blog at http://medinacorruption.blogspot.com/2015/02/who-other-than-corrupt-medina-county.html
There is an obvious question to be answered. Just who obstructed the production of the subpoenaed records? Best bet is that LAPDOG "PUBLIUS" COLLIER whipped up a sham "order" to prevent production of the records. Since LAPDOG "PUBLIUS" COLLIER lacked any and all jurisdiction to act in any official manner at that stage of the proceedings, should it be discovered that LAPDOG "PUBLIUS" COLLIER did, indeed, issue his own sham order obstructing the production of the records, then it will be one more CRIME TO BE ADDED TO THE LIST OF LAPDOG'S CRIMINAL OFFENSES.
Recently, Judge Patricia Cosgrove, presently sitting by assignment in this case, issued Court Orders instructing the same Internet Service Providers to furnish the previously subpoenaed records along with any documents pertaining to the prior failure to furnish those records.
READERS CAN BET THAT THEY'RE PUCKERING OVER AT THE MEDINA COUNTY COURTHOUSE, MOSQUE & RAILROAD STATION. IT CERTAINLY APPEARS THAT THE PROVERBIAL JIG MAY VERY WELL BE UP FOR THOSE MORONS.
NOW, DINO HOEMAN AND LAPDOG "PUBLIUS" COLLIER JUST DON'T WANT YOU, THE CITIZENS, TO DISCOVER THE EXTENT OF THEIR DELIBERATE MISCONDUCT. THEREFORE, THESE MORONS, SINGULARLY OR COLLECTIVELY, INSTRUCT THE CLERK OF COURTS ( WHO WEASELED OUT OF FELONY CHARGES IN A SWEETHEART DEAL WITH THE HOEMAN/BAXTER TAG TEAM) TO NOT PUBLISH THE JUDGE'S ORDERS AT THE CLERL'S WEBSITE.
SHOWN BELOW IS A COPY OF THE RECENT ENTRIES ON THE DOCKET IN THIS CASE, WITHHOLDING THE JUDGE'S ORDERS FROM PUBLIC VIEW:
AS HARD AS THEY TRY THESE TWO CORRUPT MORONS, CORRUPT COUNTY PROSECUTOR DINO HOEMAN AND ILLEGITIMATE "JUDGE" LAPDOG "PUBLIUS" COLLIER JUST CAN'T HIDE FROM THE TRUTH! IT'S ONLY A MATTER OF TIME NOW, AND THE CLOCK IS TICKING, "PUBLIUS."
Regular readers of this blog may recall that the innocent man, railroaded at trial and whose convictions at trial WERE TWICE REVERSED ON APPEAL BY THE COURT OF APPEALS BECAUSE OF PROSECUTORIAL AND JUDICIAL MISCONDUCT, FACILITATED BY ILLEGITIMATE "JUDGE" LAPDOG "PUBLIUS" COLLIER AND RICHARD (THE) "DICK" MARKUS, CHIEF AMONG MORONS, had supoenaed Internet Service Providers to determine the the true identity of "PUBLIUS" to a certainty.
Readers will recall that none of the subpoenaed Internet Service Providers responded or furnished the subpoenaed records. The failure of the Internet Service Providers to furnish any records at all in response to a court-issued subpoena is highly unusual.
Readers can refresh by reading a prior post at this blog captioned WHO, OTHER THAN CORRUPT MEDINA COUNTY PROSECUTOR DINO HOEMAN AND ILLEGITIMATE MEDINA judge LAPDOG "PUBLIUS" COLLIER, HAD REASON TO OBSTRUCT PRODUCTION OF SUBPOENAED RECORDS FROM INTERNET SERVICE PROVIDERS??? easily found at this blog at http://medinacorruption.blogspot.com/2015/02/who-other-than-corrupt-medina-county.html
There is an obvious question to be answered. Just who obstructed the production of the subpoenaed records? Best bet is that LAPDOG "PUBLIUS" COLLIER whipped up a sham "order" to prevent production of the records. Since LAPDOG "PUBLIUS" COLLIER lacked any and all jurisdiction to act in any official manner at that stage of the proceedings, should it be discovered that LAPDOG "PUBLIUS" COLLIER did, indeed, issue his own sham order obstructing the production of the records, then it will be one more CRIME TO BE ADDED TO THE LIST OF LAPDOG'S CRIMINAL OFFENSES.
Recently, Judge Patricia Cosgrove, presently sitting by assignment in this case, issued Court Orders instructing the same Internet Service Providers to furnish the previously subpoenaed records along with any documents pertaining to the prior failure to furnish those records.
READERS CAN BET THAT THEY'RE PUCKERING OVER AT THE MEDINA COUNTY COURTHOUSE, MOSQUE & RAILROAD STATION. IT CERTAINLY APPEARS THAT THE PROVERBIAL JIG MAY VERY WELL BE UP FOR THOSE MORONS.
NOW, DINO HOEMAN AND LAPDOG "PUBLIUS" COLLIER JUST DON'T WANT YOU, THE CITIZENS, TO DISCOVER THE EXTENT OF THEIR DELIBERATE MISCONDUCT. THEREFORE, THESE MORONS, SINGULARLY OR COLLECTIVELY, INSTRUCT THE CLERK OF COURTS ( WHO WEASELED OUT OF FELONY CHARGES IN A SWEETHEART DEAL WITH THE HOEMAN/BAXTER TAG TEAM) TO NOT PUBLISH THE JUDGE'S ORDERS AT THE CLERL'S WEBSITE.
SHOWN BELOW IS A COPY OF THE RECENT ENTRIES ON THE DOCKET IN THIS CASE, WITHHOLDING THE JUDGE'S ORDERS FROM PUBLIC VIEW:
In the interests of the public's constitutional right to know, the blogger is reproducing just one of the six court orders, referenced above, that HOEMAN and COLLIER are trying to conceal from you, the public.
AS HARD AS THEY TRY THESE TWO CORRUPT MORONS, CORRUPT COUNTY PROSECUTOR DINO HOEMAN AND ILLEGITIMATE "JUDGE" LAPDOG "PUBLIUS" COLLIER JUST CAN'T HIDE FROM THE TRUTH! IT'S ONLY A MATTER OF TIME NOW, AND THE CLOCK IS TICKING, "PUBLIUS."
Wednesday, March 4, 2015
LAPDOG "PUBLIUS" COLLIER TO PLAY TITLE ROLE IN SPRING PLAY !
In an attempt to bring more cultural awareness to the arts in Medina County, the Medina County Bar & Pickpocket Association has formed its own group of thespians, adopting the appropriate name of THE MEDINA PLAYERS given the fact that many of the membership, and particularly ILLEGITIMATE MEDINA "judge" LAPDOG "PUBLIUS" COLLIER, consider themselves to be "PLAYERS."
Many members of the MEDINA PLAYERS are husbands and fathers, including LAPDOG "PUBLIUS" COLLIER, although that fact has not prevented him from engaging in a LONGSTANDING SORDID SEXUAL RELATIONSHIP WITH HIS COURT REPORTER, MISTRESS, and MAIN SQUEEZE, DONNA "HAVE IT YOUR WAY" GARRITY.
Most, if not all, parents are familiar with the children's books detailing the adventures of Pipi Longstockings. Given that the Pipi Longstockings series is copyrighted, THE MEDINA PLAYERS, exercising no small level of creativity, has decided to present a parody of the series, entitled PIPI LAUGHINGSTOCK.
LAPDOG "PUBLIUS" COLLIER will be playing the title role of PIPI LAUGHINGSTOCK by unanimous accord of THE MEDINA PLAYERS.
The storyline of the one act play is relatively straightforward. PIPI is a corrupt judge in a county far, far away in the Land of Oz, who was caught altering transcripts with the aid of his MISTRESS and MAIN SQUEEZE. PIPI'S misdeeds are discovered by a blogger to whom PIPI sends more than 400 offending and threatening electronic messages using all sorts of assumed names, including "PUBLIUS."
As the play draws to a close, the blogger finally publicly discloses all manner of PIPI'S misdeeds, many of which are likely to cause him to be imprisoned. The final "blow" occurs when the residents of the far, far away county in the Land of Oz learn that PIPI has been engaged in a LONGSTANDING SORDID SEXUAL RELATIONSHIP with one of the court staff, even though he is legally married with a wife and daughter tucked safely away at home.
THE CONVERGENCE OF ALL OF THESE EVENTS IN THE PUBLIC FORUM CREATES THE PERFECT CIRCUMSTANCES FOR PIPI TO BECOME THE LAUGHINGSTOCK OF THAT FAR, FAR AWAY COUNTY IN THE LAND OF OZ.
THERE IS NO DOUBT THAT LAPDOG "PUBLIUS" COLLIER WILL LEND AN AIR OF AUTHENTICITY AND BELIEVABILITY IN HIS LEAD ROLE AS PIPI LAUGHINGSTOCK. BRAVO!
Many members of the MEDINA PLAYERS are husbands and fathers, including LAPDOG "PUBLIUS" COLLIER, although that fact has not prevented him from engaging in a LONGSTANDING SORDID SEXUAL RELATIONSHIP WITH HIS COURT REPORTER, MISTRESS, and MAIN SQUEEZE, DONNA "HAVE IT YOUR WAY" GARRITY.
Most, if not all, parents are familiar with the children's books detailing the adventures of Pipi Longstockings. Given that the Pipi Longstockings series is copyrighted, THE MEDINA PLAYERS, exercising no small level of creativity, has decided to present a parody of the series, entitled PIPI LAUGHINGSTOCK.
LAPDOG "PUBLIUS" COLLIER will be playing the title role of PIPI LAUGHINGSTOCK by unanimous accord of THE MEDINA PLAYERS.
The storyline of the one act play is relatively straightforward. PIPI is a corrupt judge in a county far, far away in the Land of Oz, who was caught altering transcripts with the aid of his MISTRESS and MAIN SQUEEZE. PIPI'S misdeeds are discovered by a blogger to whom PIPI sends more than 400 offending and threatening electronic messages using all sorts of assumed names, including "PUBLIUS."
As the play draws to a close, the blogger finally publicly discloses all manner of PIPI'S misdeeds, many of which are likely to cause him to be imprisoned. The final "blow" occurs when the residents of the far, far away county in the Land of Oz learn that PIPI has been engaged in a LONGSTANDING SORDID SEXUAL RELATIONSHIP with one of the court staff, even though he is legally married with a wife and daughter tucked safely away at home.
THE CONVERGENCE OF ALL OF THESE EVENTS IN THE PUBLIC FORUM CREATES THE PERFECT CIRCUMSTANCES FOR PIPI TO BECOME THE LAUGHINGSTOCK OF THAT FAR, FAR AWAY COUNTY IN THE LAND OF OZ.
THERE IS NO DOUBT THAT LAPDOG "PUBLIUS" COLLIER WILL LEND AN AIR OF AUTHENTICITY AND BELIEVABILITY IN HIS LEAD ROLE AS PIPI LAUGHINGSTOCK. BRAVO!
Monday, March 2, 2015
WILDLIFE OFFICERS ON HIGH ALERT !
Wildlife officers have been placed on high alert in Northeast Ohio based upon unusual reports that a heretofore unknown species of Woodpecker(s) have taken up residence in the Medina County Courthouse, Mosque & Railroad Station.
The reported invasion of the Medina County Courthouse, Mosque & Railroad Station has stumped biologists since this species of Woodpecker has rarely. if ever, been seen in climes north of the equator. In fact, this Woodpecker(s) has not actually been seen in Medina County.
All the excitement has been generated solely by anecdotal evidence.
The story goes that the night cleaning crew unexpectedly came upon a series of pecker tracks in the private chambers of illegitimate Medina Judge LAPDOG "PUBLIUS" COLLIER. Custodial staff reportedly discovered a strange series of pecker tracks located precisely on LAPDOG COLLIER'S desk.
A thorough search of LAPDOG's chambers found no other evidence of pecker tracks anywhere in the room except for the unexplained pecker tracks found on LAPDOG COLLIER'S desk.
There were no signs of the same or similar pecker tracks in LAPDOG'S KANGAROO COURTROOM #1.
Nevertheless, the unexplained pecker tracks on LAPDOG'S desk prompted a thorough search of the Medina County Courthouse, Mosque & Railroad Station, from top to bottom.
Strangely, the only other pecker tracks found anywhere else in the building were located in the office of LAPDOG COLLIER'S MISTRESS, MAIN SQUEEZE DONNA "HAVE IT YOUR WAY" GARRITY.
Much like the pecker tracks found in LAPDOG "PUBLIUS" COLLIER'S chambers, the only pecker tracks found in GARRITY'S office were located squarely on her desk, and apparently nowhere else in the room. To the trained eye, the pecker tracks found on GARRITY'S desk appear to be identical to the pecker tracks found on LAPDOG COLLIER'S desk. Puzzling, isn't it?
This is an entirely confounding series of circumstances that defy any reasonable explanation. To be sure, GARRITY'S office is right outside of LAPDOG COLLIER'S KANGAROO COURTROOM #1, but there is no publicly known access from LAPDOG COLLIER'S chambers to "HAVE IT YOUR WAY" GARRITY'S adjacent office space.
It is difficult to comprehend how the elusive and unseen Woodpecker was able to conceal itself in the Medina County Courthouse, Mosque & Railroad Station, and yet somehow leave pecker tracks on the desks of both LAPDOG COLLIER and DONNA "HAVE IT YOUR WAY" GARRITY, but nowhere else in the building.
Unless some sharp-eyed ornithologist happens to spy the elusive Woodpecker in or around the Medina County Courthouse, Mosque & Railroad Station, the manner in which the otherwise unexplained pecker tracks came to be deposited upon the desks of LAPDOG "PUBLIUS" COLLIER and DONNA "HAVE IT YOUR WAY" GARRITY will forever remain a mystery.
The reported invasion of the Medina County Courthouse, Mosque & Railroad Station has stumped biologists since this species of Woodpecker has rarely. if ever, been seen in climes north of the equator. In fact, this Woodpecker(s) has not actually been seen in Medina County.
All the excitement has been generated solely by anecdotal evidence.
The story goes that the night cleaning crew unexpectedly came upon a series of pecker tracks in the private chambers of illegitimate Medina Judge LAPDOG "PUBLIUS" COLLIER. Custodial staff reportedly discovered a strange series of pecker tracks located precisely on LAPDOG COLLIER'S desk.
A thorough search of LAPDOG's chambers found no other evidence of pecker tracks anywhere in the room except for the unexplained pecker tracks found on LAPDOG COLLIER'S desk.
There were no signs of the same or similar pecker tracks in LAPDOG'S KANGAROO COURTROOM #1.
Nevertheless, the unexplained pecker tracks on LAPDOG'S desk prompted a thorough search of the Medina County Courthouse, Mosque & Railroad Station, from top to bottom.
Strangely, the only other pecker tracks found anywhere else in the building were located in the office of LAPDOG COLLIER'S MISTRESS, MAIN SQUEEZE DONNA "HAVE IT YOUR WAY" GARRITY.
Much like the pecker tracks found in LAPDOG "PUBLIUS" COLLIER'S chambers, the only pecker tracks found in GARRITY'S office were located squarely on her desk, and apparently nowhere else in the room. To the trained eye, the pecker tracks found on GARRITY'S desk appear to be identical to the pecker tracks found on LAPDOG COLLIER'S desk. Puzzling, isn't it?
This is an entirely confounding series of circumstances that defy any reasonable explanation. To be sure, GARRITY'S office is right outside of LAPDOG COLLIER'S KANGAROO COURTROOM #1, but there is no publicly known access from LAPDOG COLLIER'S chambers to "HAVE IT YOUR WAY" GARRITY'S adjacent office space.
It is difficult to comprehend how the elusive and unseen Woodpecker was able to conceal itself in the Medina County Courthouse, Mosque & Railroad Station, and yet somehow leave pecker tracks on the desks of both LAPDOG COLLIER and DONNA "HAVE IT YOUR WAY" GARRITY, but nowhere else in the building.
Unless some sharp-eyed ornithologist happens to spy the elusive Woodpecker in or around the Medina County Courthouse, Mosque & Railroad Station, the manner in which the otherwise unexplained pecker tracks came to be deposited upon the desks of LAPDOG "PUBLIUS" COLLIER and DONNA "HAVE IT YOUR WAY" GARRITY will forever remain a mystery.
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