Sunday, October 8, 2017

MEDINA GASSETTE REPORTS MEDINA SHERIFF ANNOUNCES MAJOR PERSONNEL ACTION !

THE MEDINA GASSETTE, THE ORACLE OF THE MEDINA REPUBLICRAT PARTY, HAS JUST REPORTED LATE-BREAKING NEWS BASED UPON A PRESS RELEASE FROM THE OFFICE OF MEDINA COUNTY SHERIFF "I DUNNO" MILLER.

SHERIFF "I DUNNO" MILLER WHO APPEARS TO BE OPERATING IN A FOG MOST DAYS (OFTEN NOT KNOWING WHICH DAY OF THE WEEK IT MAY BE) HAS ANNOUNCED A MAJOR PROMOTION FROM WITHIN THE RANKS OF THE MORONS HE EMPLOYS TO BADGER AND TO ANNOY THE CITIZENS OF MEDINA COUNTY WHILE HAVING NOT THE SLIGHTEST CONCEPT OF THE BASIC CONSTITUTIONAL PROTECTIONS GUARANTEED TO CITIZENS BY THE UNITED STATES AND OHIO CONSTITUTIONS.

"I DUNNO" MILLER'S LATEST ANNOUNCEMENT IS CERTAINLY PROOF OF THAT PROPOSITION.

REGULAR READERS OF THS BLOG MAY RECALL THAT LYING SHERIFF'S CRAPTAIN PINOCCHIO "DESK JOCKEY" CENTNER(D) CAME TO THE MEDINA COUNTY SHERIFF'S OFFICE FROM NORTH ROYALTON, OHIO, A VERITABLE HOTBED OF VIOLENT CRIME, LIKE DRIVING 36 MPH IN A 35 MPH SPEED ZONE!

IN HIS PRIOR "EMPLOYMENT" AT THE NORTH ROYALTON POLICE DEPARTMENT, CENTNER(D) HELD THE POSITION OF PENCIL-PUSHING, PAPER-SHUFFLING SERGEANT WHOSE PRIMARY RESPONSIBILITY, IT SEEMS, WAS TO REVIEW TRAFFIC CITATIONS, ISSUED BY POLICE PATROLMEN, FOR LEGIBILITY AND ACCURACY.  THAT, OF COURSE, WAS A HEAVY RESPONSIBILITY. AFTER ALL, WHAT WOULD THE CITY OF NORTH ROYALTON DO WITHOUT A DEPENDABLE REVENUE STREAM?

AFTER A FAILED RUN FOR THE OFFICE OF SHERIFF, PINOCCHIO CENTNER(D) CAME TO "WORK" AT THE MEDINA COUNTY SHERIFF'S OFFICE WHERE HE RECEIVED AN INSTANT PROMOTION FROM PENCIL-PUSHING, PAPER-SHUFFLING SERGEANT TO PENCIL-PUSHING, PAPER-SHUFFLING, DESK JOCKEY CRAPTAIN.

IT CERTAINLY AMAZES THE BLOGGER THAT SOMEONE LIKE CENTNER(D), WITH NO CREDIBLE ACTUAL LAW ENFORCEMENT CREDENTIALS, WAS PLACED IN A SUPERVISORY POSITION AT THE SHERIFF'S OFFICE. THIS IS TRULY A CLASSIC CASE OF THE BLIND LEADING THE BLIND.

OF COURSE, IN HIS ROLE AS CRAPTAIN, LYING PINOCCHIO CENTNER(D) WAS VESTED WITH THE RESPONSIBILITY TO "SUPERVISE" THE "NON-INVESTIGATION" OF THE HOMICIDE OF LAFAYETTE TOWNSHiP TRUSTEE BRYON MACRON.  WHAT A COLOSSAL MISTAKE THAT WAS!

AS REGULAR READERS OF THIS BLOG WELL KNOW LYING PINOCCHIO CENTNER(D) CONDUCTED A "PRESS CONFERENCE" TO ANNOUNCE THAT HIS COVEY OF "SUMMER'S EVE" DEFECTIVES HAD CONCLUDED THAT BRYON MACRON TOOK HIS OWN LIFE AND THEN,  FOLLOWING HIS DEATH, CAST HIMSELF IN THE OPEN WATERS OF CHIPPEWA LAKE WITHOUT LEAVING ANY FOOTPRINTS OR BLOOD TRAIL IN THE SNOW!!!

NEEDLESS TO SAY, NO ONE IN THE COMMUNITY BOUGHT CENTNER(D)'S LINE OF BULLSHIT THAT EVEN STEVIE WONDER CAN SEE THROUGH!

WELL, FOLLOWING CENTNER(D)'S PERFORMANCE AT THAT RIDICULOUS PRESS CONFERENCE, AT WHICH CENTNER(D) (WITH NO OBVIOUS EXPERIENCE INVESTIGATING AND PROSECUTING VIOLENT CRIMES, INCLUDING HOMICIDE) HANDED A DEFENSE TO THE INDIVIDUALS WHO MURDERED BRYON MACRON ON NOTHING LESS THAN A SILVER PLATTER, SHERIFF "I DUNNO" MILLER RECEIVED A SUBSTANTIAL AMOUNT OF FEEDBACK FROM LOCAL RESIDENTS.

A NUMBER OF CITIZEN CALLERS DREW TO THE SHERIFF'S ATTENTION THAT THERE WAS ABSOLUTELY NO QUESTION THAT CENTNER(D) IS OBVIOUSLY A MAJOR F@@KUP!

AFTER HEARING THESE ENDORSEMENTS FROM RESIDENTS, SHERIFF "I DUNNO" MILLER RAPIDLY CAME TO THE CONCLUSION THAT RESIDENTS SUPPORTED THE PROMOTION OF LYING CRAPTAIN PINOCCHIO "DESK JOCKEY" CENTER(D) TO THE POSITION OF MAJOR!!

IT IS CERTAINLY GRATIFYING TO KNOW THAT SHERIFF "I DUNNO" MILLER HAS LISTENED TO THE PUBLIC AND, IN RESPONSE, HAS RECOGNIZED PINOCCHIO "DESK JOCKEY" CENTNER(D)  AS A MAJOR F@@KUP!  THIS RECOGNITION HAS BEEN A LONG TIME COMING!

Wednesday, September 27, 2017

JUST WHO IS DUMB AND WHO IS DUMBER?

THE BLOGGER FINDS IT DISCONCERTING AND PERPLEXING WHEN TRYING TO DECIDE WHO IS DUMB AND WHO IS DUMBER, SHERIFF'S CRAPTAIN PINOCCHIO "DESK JOCKEY" CENTNER(D), A PROVEN LIAROR HIS "LEAD DEFECTIVE," DICKLESS TRACY!

THESE TWO MORONS ARE PRIME CANDIDATES FOR THE RINGLING BROTHERS CLOWN COLLEGE!

PINOCCHIO CENTNER(D) HAD BEEN FORMERLY EMPLOYED AS A PAPER-SHUFFLING SERGEANT AT THE NORTH ROYALTON POLICE DEPARTMENT, REVIEWING TRAFFIC CITATIONS WRITTEN BY PATROLMEN. THE LEVEL OF HIS COMPETENT AND CREDIBLE "LAW ENFORCEMENT EXPERIENCE" IS QUESTIONABLE, AT BEST.  OF COURSE, THE NORTH ROYALTON MAYOR FORCED CENTNER(D) TO LEAVE HIS PAPER-SHUFFLING POSITION AT NORTH ROYALTON WHEN CENTNER(D) MADE AN UNSUCCESSFUL RUN FOR THE OFFICE OF SHERIFF.

OF COURSE, PINOCCHIO "DESK JOCKEY: CENTNER(D) WAS RAPIDLY PROMOTED WHEN HE LEFT NORTH ROYALTON AS A PAPER-SHUFFLING SERGEANT TO BECOME A BEAN-COUNTING CRAPTAIN AND DESK JOCKEY AT THE MEDINA COUNTY SHERIFF'S OFFICE, TAKING HIS MARCHING ORDERS FROM LAFAYETTE TOWNSHIP TRUSTEE LYNDA BOWERS.  THAT, OF COURSE, IS UNDERSTANDABLE GIVEN THE FACT THAT CENTNER(D) WANTS TO RUN FOR THE OFFICE OF SHERIFF AND BOWERS CAN MAKE SURE HIS NAME IS ON THE BALLOT, AS CENTNER(D) WELL KNOWS.

CENTNER(D)'S INSTANT PROMOTION FROM PAPER-SHUFFLING SERGEANT TO BEAN-COUNTING CRAPTAIN DEMONSTRATES JUST HOW LOW EMPLOYMENT STANDARDS HAVE SUNK AT THE MEDINA COUNTY SHERIFF'S OFFICE! 

JUST HOW DUMB IS PINOCCHIO "DESK JOCKEY" CENTNER(D)?  THE STRAIGHTFORWARD ANSWER TO THAT QUESTION IS "REALLY DAMN DUMB" !!!

PINOCCHIO "DESK JOCKEY" CENTNER(D), WHO IS NO MORE THAN A PAPER-SHUFFLING BEAN-COUNTER, JUST HANDED THE BAD GUY(S) WHO WILL ULTIMATELY BE CHARGED WITH THE AGGRAVATED MURDER OF BRYON MACRON A READY-MADE DEFENSE BY PUBLICLY DECLARING THAT "NO ONE BUT MR. MACRON WAS INVOLVED WITH HIS DEATH."

WHEN THE BAD GUY(S) ARE FINALLY INDICTED FOR THE OFFENSES OF KIDNAPING AND AGGRAVATED MURDER (IN SPITE OF THE COMPLETE INDIFFERENCE AND COMPLETE INCOMPETENCE OF THE MEDINA COUNTY SHERIFF) ,  DEFENSE ATTORNEYS WILL BE CALLING CENTNER AND HIS COVEY OF "SUMMER'S EVE" DEFECTIVES TO TESTIFY FOR THE DEFENSE, OFFERING TESTIMONY TO JUSTIFY THEIR WILD AND UNFOUNDED CONCLUSION THAT BRYON MACRON TOOK HIS OWN LIFE.

CAN YOU, THE READERS, BELIEVE THAT THESE INCOMPETENT MORONS FROM THE SHERIFF'S OFFICE WILL BE CALLED TO BOLSTER THE DEFENSE? THIS IS NOTHING SHORT OF UNBELIEVABLE! PERHAPS LYNDA BOWERS WILL BE CALLED TO VOUCH FOR PINOCCHIO CENTNER(D) AND PERHAPS CAN BE EXPECTED TO TESTIFY THAT CENTNER(D) DID NO MORE THAN FOLLOWING THE MARCHING ORDERS SHE GAVE HIM SO THAT, IN RETURN,  SHE WOULD MANAGE TO GET HIS NAME ON THE BALLOT IN THE NEXT ELECTION.

THE LONG AND SHORT OF IT IS THAT LYING PINOCCHIO "DESK JOCKEY" CENTNER(D) IS NOTHING SHORT OF A COMPLETE AND TOTAL IDIOT WHO OBVIOUSLY HAS NO CREDIBLE REAL-WORLD EXPERIENCE IN BRINGING PROSECUTIONS IN CRIMINAL CASES.  CENTNER(D)'S "EXPERIENCE," WHICH LIKELY AMOUNTS TO NO MORE THAN TESTIFYING IN MAYOR'S COURT ON TRAFFIC CASES, DEMONSTRATES HE IS TOTALLY UNFIT TO "INVESTIGATE" AND 
BRING PROSECUTIONS IN VIOLENT CRIMES LIKE THE HOMICIDE OF LAFAYETTE TOWNSHIP TRUSTEE BRYON MACRON.

THE BLOGGER IS AMAZED THAT TAXPAYERS BEAR THE BURDEN OF CENTNER(D)'S SALARY WHEN HE IS SUPREMELY UNQUALIFIED TO MUCH OF ANYTHING BUT TROLL AND MONITOR THE INTERNET AND ADMINISTER THE SHERIFF'S WORTHLESS FACEBOOK PAGE.

THIS CLOWN MAY BE QUALIFIED TO "SERVE" AS THE SHERIFF OF "SAFETY TOWN," BUT THAT IS ABOUT IT!

DICKLESS TRACY, LYING CENTER(D)'S "LEAD DEFECTIVE" IS CERTAINLY NOT THE BRIGHTEST BULB EITHER!  IN FACT, HE IS JUST ONE MORE UNQUALIFIED CLUELESS MORON SUCKING ON THE TAXPAYERS' TEAT!

DICKLESS TRACY IS ANOTHER REAL DANDY.  GIVEN THE FACT THAT LYING PINOCCHIO "DESK JOCKEY" CENTNER(D) DOESN'T KNOW HIS ASS FROM A HOLE IN THE GROUND WHEN IT COMES TO INVESTIGATION OF VIOLENT CRIMES, IT IS EASILY UNDERSTANDABLE HOW HE COULD ASSIGN A HAPLESS BOOB LIKE DICKLESS TRACY TO "LEAD" THE NON-INVESTIGATION INTO THE OBVIOUS HOMICIDE OF LAFAYETTE TOWNSHIP TRUSTEE BRYON MACRON.

HOW MUCH INTELLIGENCE DOES IT TAKE TO RECOGNIZE THAT, WHEN BRYON MACRON WENT "MISSING," IT WAS IMPERATIVE TO INTERVIEW MR. MACRON'S FAMILY, FRIENDS AND ASSOCIATES TO DETERMINE WHAT WAS GOING ON IN HIS LIFE AT THE TIME OF HIS "MYSTERIOUS DISAPPEARANCE?" 

THAT THOUGHT NEVER OCCURRED DICKLESS TRACY WHO FAILED TO CONDUCT ANY SUCH INTERVIEWS.  EVEN A ROOKIE COULDN'T OVERLOOK SOMETHING AS BASIC AS THAT!

ON DECEMBER 16, 2016, THE DATE ON WHICH BRYON MACRON WENT "MYSTERIOUSLY MISSING" FROM THE LAFAYETTE TOWNSHIP ADMINISTRATION BUILDING, ANY REASONABLE PERSON WOULD HAVE CONCLUDED THAT, AT A MINIMUM, IT WAS TIME TO ORGANIZE A FOOT SEARCH FOR THE ENVIRONS OF LAFAYETTE TOWNSHIP AND THE VILLAGE OF CHIPPEWA LAKE.

THAT THOUGHT NEVER OCCURRED TO DICKLESS TRACY. NO SEARCH FOR BRYON MACRON WAS EVER CONDUCTED IN THE AFFECTED AREA!  EVEN MORE OUTRAGEOUS, THE F@@KING IDIOTS FROM THE SHERIFF'S OFFICE BARRED LAFAYETTE FIRE SERVICE FROM SEARCHING THE OPEN WATERS OF CHIPPEWA LAKE.

TO BE FAIR TO DICKLESS TRACY, NOT THAT HE DESERVES ANY FAIRNESS AT ALL GIVE THE MANNER HE HAS TREATED THE MACRON FAMILY, IT SEEMS LIKELY THAT THE ORDER BARRING THE FIRE SERVICE FROM SEARCHING THE LAKE WAS A "COMMAND" DECISION MADE BY LYING CRAPTAIN PINOCCHIO "DESK JOCKEY" CENTNER(D), A PAPER-SHUFFLING DESK JOCKEY AND BEAN-COUNTER WITH NO COMPETENT AND CREDIBLE REAL LAW ENFORCEMENT EXPERIENCE.

CONSIDER THE FACT THAT, AT ONE POINT IN HIS NON-INVESTIGATION, DICKLESS TRACY SUGGESTED TO MR. MACRON'S GRIEVING WIFE THAT BRYON MACRON MAY HAVE BEEN ADMITTED TO A PSYCHIATRIC HOSPITAL (ANOTHER TYPICAL UNSUPPORTED SUPPOSITION HE OBVIOUSLY PULLED OUT OF HIS ASS).  DICKLESS TRACY LEFT IT TO MRS. MACRON TO MAKE THOSE INQUIRIES OF PSYCHIATRIC HOSPITALS ON HER OWN.  IT WAS OBVIOUSLY TOO MUCH TROUBLE FOR DICKLESS TRACY TO PERFORM THE FUNCTIONS OF THE JOB HE WAS PAID BY TAXPAYERS TO DO.  PROBABLY INTERFERED WITH A DONUT RUN TO DUNKIN' DONUTS!

THEN AGAIN, KNOWING FULL WELL THAT DICKLESS TRACY WASN'T REALLY DOING ANYTHING TO SOLVE THE "DISAPPEARANCE" OF HER HUSBAND, MRS. MACRON DEVELOPED INFORMATION THAT BRYON MAY HAVE BEEN SEEN IN ANOTHER COMMUNITY. UNDERSTANDABLY, MRS. MACRON PICKED UP THE PHONE AND CONTACTED THE POLICE DEPARTMENT IN THAT COMMUNITY ONLY TO LEARN THERE HAD BEEN NO FIRM BASIS FOR THE ALLEGED SIGHTING.

LATER DICKLESS TRACY PLACED A PHONE CALL TO MRS. MACRON AND THREATENED, "DON'T YOU EVER CALL ANOTHER DEPARTMENT!" DICKLESS APPARENTLY FAILED TO RECOGNIZE THAT MRS. MACRON REALIZED HE WAS ANOTHER DO-NOTHING MEDINA MORON AND WAS EMBARRASSED BY THE FACT THAT MRS. MACRON BEAT HIM TO THE PUNCH IN RUNNING DOWN THE LEAD (AS IF DICKLESS INTENDED TO RUN ANYWHERE BUT DUNKIN' DONUTS).

EVEN MORE INSTRUCTIVE IS DICKLESS TRACY'S FAILURE TO COMPLETE THE MOST BASIC OF TASKS, TAKING DNA SAMPLES!  AS PREVIOUSLY REPORTED, THE MEDINA GASSETTE REPORTED THAT DICKLESS HAD BEEN TAKING DNA SAMPLES FROM LAFAYETTE TOWNSHIP FIRE SERVICE PERSONNEL, INFORMATION FED TO THE GASSETTE FOR PUBLIC CONSUMPTION, AS IF THE SHERIFF'S OFFICE HAD BEEN TAKING THE HOMICIDE OF BRYON MACRON SERIOUSLY.

THE FACT IS THAT DISCKLESS TRACY DID NOT EVEN ATTEMPT TO OBTAIN DNA SAMPLES FROM ALL FIRE SERVICE PERSONNEL.  THAT IS BAD ENOUGH, BUT THERE IS MORE.

DICKLESS TRACY F@@KED UP THE DNA SAMPLES HE DID MANAGE TO TAKE BETWEEN DONUT BREAKS.  DICKLESS FAILED TO READ THE INSTRUCTIONS AND FAILED TO TAKE THE MOST BASIC, COMMON-SENSE ACTIONS WHEN OBTAINING DNA SAMPLES. DICKLESS FAILED TO CHANGE STERILE GLOVES AFTER TAKING EACH SAMPLE AND CROSS-CONTAMINATED EACH AND EVERY DNA SAMPLE HE GRUDGINGLY TOOK.  THE PURPORTED DNA SAMPLES THAT DICKLESS TRACY TOOK WERE COMPLETELY USELESS AND OFFERED NO POTENTIAL FOR ANY ANALYSIS AND COMPARISON!

PERHAPS DICKLESS TRACY NEEDS TO TAKE A REMEDIAL READING COURSE SO THE NEXT TIME HE IS ASKED TO DO SOMETHING WELL ABOVE HIS PAY GRADE HE WILL BE INSPIRED TO READ THE INSTRUCTIONS AND ACT ACCORDINGLY.  THAT, HOWEVER, MAY BE JUST TOO MUCH TO EXPECT OF THIS MORON.

THERE YOU HAVE IT, READERS! YOU BE JUDGE! WHO IS DUMB AND WHO IS THE DUMBER OF THE TWO, LYING PINOCCHIO "DESK JOCKEY" CENTER(D), A PAPER-SHUFFLING, PENCIL-PUSHING DESK JOCKEY WITH NO EXPERIENCE IN THE INVESTIGATION OF VIOLENT CRIMES, OR DICKLESS TRACY, CENTNER(D)'S LEAD DEFECTIVE WHO FAILED TO COMPREHEND AND CARRY OUT THE MOST BASIC OF ACTIONS THAT WOULD ORDINARILY BE EXPECTED OF A ROOKIE?

TO THE BLOGGER, THIS LOOKS LIKE A CLASSIC CASE OF THE BLIND "LEADING' THE BLIND!

Wednesday, September 20, 2017

SHERIFF THREATENS BLOGGER OVER WELL-DESERVED HEAT!!!

THE BLOGGER OBVIOUSLY STRUCK A RAW NERVE IN A PRIOR POST, POSITING THE SUSPICION THAT THE MEDINA COUNTY SHERIFF'S OFFICE IS COVERING UP THE HOMICIDE OF LAFAYETTE TOWNSHIP TRUSTEE BRYON MACRON

THE BLOGGER HAS SIMPLY GIVEN VOICE TO THE LONG-HELD BELIEF IN THE COMMUNITY, NOTHING MORE!

ON JULY 14, 2017, PINOCCHIO "DESK JOCKEY" CENTNER(D), A CRAPTAIN AT THE MEDINA COUNTY SHERIFF'S OFFICE, HAS THREATENED THE BLOGGER ON THE VERY MORNING THAT THE BLOG DISCLOSED THE COVER-UP OF THE HOMICIDE OF LAFAYETTE TRUSTEE BRYON MACRON!!!!

HERE'S THE SCOOP!

AT 8:35 AM ON THE MORNING OF JULY 14, 2017, MRS. MACRON'S ATTORNEY RECEIVED A PHONE CALL FROM CRAPTAIN PINOCCHIO "DESK JOCKEY" CENTNER(D), A CRAPTAIN AT THE SHERIFF'S OFFICE. DURING THE CONVERSATION, CRAPTAIN CENTNER(D) RAISED THE ALLEGATION THAT "THERE IS A GUY IN THE COUNTY WITH A BLOG" (THE BLOGGER, OBVIOUSLY)ABOUT WHOM "THEY" HAD "RECEIVED REPORTS" THAT THE BLOGGER HAD BEEN REPRESENTING HIMSELF AS AN ACTIVE FEDERAL LAW ENFORCEMENT OFFICER, THEN EXPRESSLY IDENTIFYING THE BLOGGER'S FORMER EMPLOYING FEDERAL AGENCY.  CRAPTAIN CENTNER(D) FURTHER INFORMED MRS. MACRON'S ATTORNEY THAT "THEY ARE KEEPING AN EYE" ON THE BLOGGER.

IT IS PERFECTLY CLEAR THAT CENTNER(D) IS AN UNABASHED LIAR OF THE FIRST ORDER. CENTNER(D)'S CLAIM IS NOTHING MORE THAN A DELIBERATE FABRICATION AND FALSIFICATION.  SO MUCH FOR ANY CLAIM HE MAY HAVE HAD TO HONESTY AND INTEGRITY! NOT MUCH OF A SURPRISES THERE, AFTER ALL.

"THEY" HAD NOT RECEIVED ANY SUCH ALLEGED REPORTS BECAUSE  IT NEVER HAPPENED!  THE BLOGGER HAS ALWAYS IDENTIFIED HIMSELF, AT THIS BLOG AND ELSEWHERE, AS A "RETIRED FEDERAL LAW ENFORCEMENT OFFICER" WITHOUT REFERENCE IN ANY FASHION TO HIS PRIOR EMPLOYING AGENCY.

KNOWING FULL WELL THAT "THEY" HAVE FRAMED INNOCENT CITIZENS IN THE PAST, IT WAS CLEAR TO THE BLOGGER THAT CRAPTAIN PINOCCHIO CENTNER(D) WAS MAKING A VEILED THREAT TO BRING TRUMPED-UP CHARGES AGAINST THE BLOGGER UNLESS THE BLOGGER BACKS OFF FROM ASSISTING THE MACRON FAMILY IN BRINGING THE PSYCHOPATH WHO MURDERED BRYON MACRON TO JUSTICE.

LYING CENTNER(D), IN A REALLY STUPID MOVE, DID NO MORE THAN VALIDATE THE BLOGGER'S CLAIMS IN THE PRIOR POST THAT THE SHERIFF'S OFFICE IS TRYING TO KEEP THE LID ON THEIR (NON)INVESTIGATION OF THE MURDER OF BRYON MACRON BY MEANS OF THREATS AND INTIMIDATION.

DURING THE CONVERSATION WITH LYING CENTNER(D), THE BLOGGER EXPRESSED HIS OPINION THAT CENTNER(D) WAS INCAPABLE OF SOLVING THE MURDER OF BRYON MACRON.

HISTORY IS ON THE BLOGGER'S SIDE WITH THAT CONCLUSION. OF COURSE THE BLOGGER DIDN'T NEED A CRYSTAL BALL TO PREDICT THE FAILURE OF THE SHERIFF'S OFFICE TO SOLVE THIS CRIME!

CENTNER(D) RETORTED THAT THE BLOGGER DID NOT KNOW WHAT HIS AGENCY HAD DONE, OR NOT DONE, IN THEIR PATHETIC ATTEMPTS TO WHITEWASH THIS CASE.

SETTING ASIDE THE FACT THAT THEY HAVE NOT DONE ONE F@@KING THING TO ADEQUATELY ADDRESS THE OBVIOUS HOMICIDE OF BRYON MACRON, THE BLOGGER CONCEDED THE TRUTH OF THAT ASSERTION BUT FOR ONE GLARING EXCEPTION.  THE BLOGGER INFORMED CENTNER(D) HIS "AGENCY" NEVER INTERVIEWED THE FAMILY, INCLUDING MR. MACRON'S GRIEVING WIFE !  NOR HAS CENTNER(D)'S "SUMMER'S EVE" DEFECTIVES INTERVIEWED ANY OF MR. MACRON'S FAMILY MEMBERS, FRIENDS, AND ASSOCIATES!

FOLLOWING THE NOT-SO-CORDIAL CONVERSATION WITH LYING CENTNER(D), THE BLOGGER PLACED A PHONE CALL TO COUNTY PROSECUTOR FORREST THOMPSON TO REPORT THAT LYING CENTNER(D)'S VEILED THREATS AND ATTEMPTS AT INTIMIDATION WERE NOT WELL RECEIVED.

MR. THOMPSON, WHOM THE BLOGGER BELIEVES TO BE AN HONEST AND HONORABLE MAN, WAS CLEARLY UNHAPPY THAT THE BLOGGER ALLEGED A COVER-UP.  BE THAT AS IT MAY, UNLIKE THE MORON WHO PREVIOUSLY HELD THE OFFICE OF COUNTY PROSECUTOR, MR. THOMPSON CONCEDED THAT THE BLOGGER IS PROTECTED BY THE FIRST AMENDMENT TO THE UNITED STATES CONSTITUTION.

IT IS NOTHING SHORT OF A BREATH OF FRESH AIR TO HAVE SOMEONE IN THE MEDINA COUNTY "JUSTUS" SYSTEM TO CITE TO AND RELY UPON THE CONSTITUTION!  THE PROOF, HOWEVER, LIES IN THE PUDDING.

THE BLOGGER SUGGESTED TO MR. THOMPSON, WHO DOES NOT APPROVE OF THE BLOGGER'S EFFORTS ON BEHALF OF THE MACRON FAMILY, THAT THOMPSON INFORM LYING PINOCCHIO CENTNER(D) THAT THE BLOGGER HAS EVERY INTENTION TO STAY OUT OF THE SHERIFF'S WAY AND, AS LONG AS THE SHERIFF STAYS OUT OF THE BLOGGER'S WAY, ALL WILL BE FINE.

THE BACK STORY HERE IS THAT THE BLOGGER, STEPPING OUT OF RETIREMENT,  HAS OFFERED HIS ASSISTANCE AND EXPERTISE TO THE MACRON FAMILY TO BRING BRYON'S KILLER TO JUSTICE.

THE SHERIFF'S OFFICE HAS BEEN FLOUNDERING AROUND IN THE DARK FOR MORE THAN NINE MONTHS WITH NO APPARENT RESULTS, EVIDENCED BY THE FACT THAT THEY HAVE NOT CHARGED ANYONE WITH BRYON MACRON'S  HOMICIDE, CHOOSING INSTEAD TO SWEEP BRYON MACRON'S MURDER UNDER THE RUG AS A "SUICIDE."

IN CONTRAST, THE BLOGGER HAS EXTENSIVELY INTERVIEWED MRS. MACRON AND OTHER MACRON FAMILY MEMBERS.  WITH THE FACTS AND INFORMATION THE MACRON FAMILY DEVELOPED INDEPENDENTLY OF THE SHERIFF'S OFFICE, IT HAS TAKEN THE BLOGGER ABOUT THREE WEEKS TO BRING A COMPETENT INVESTIGATION OF THE HOMICIDE OF BRYON MACRON INTO FOCUS, WITH SUSPECTS.

THE BLOGGER HAS INTERVIEWED A NUMBER OF BRYON MACRON'S FRIENDS AND ASSOCIATES, NONE OF WHOM WERE EVER INTERVIEWED BY SHERIFF'S DEFECTIVES.

WHAT DOES THAT TELL YOU ABOUT THEIR ALLEGED "DUE DILIGENCE" CLAIMED BY CENTNER(D) AT HIS INFAMOUS "PRESS CONFERENCE" IN WHICH HE TRIED TO UNLOAD A TON OF UNADULTERATED BULLSHIT UPON THE PUBLIC!

THE DEFECTIVES ALLEGED "DILIGENCE" IS LONG OVERDUE AND COMPLETELY WANTING.

THE LONG AND SHORT OF IT IS THAT CRAPTAIN PINOCCHIO "DESK JOCKEY" CENTNER(D) IS NOTHING MORE THAN ONE MORE LYING MEDINA COUNTY PUBLIC OFFICIAL WHO WANTS TO BE THE NEXT DO-NOTHING, UNEDUCATED, INEXPERIENCED SHERIFF OF MEDINA COUNTY!

IF PINOCCHIO "DESK JOCKEY" CENTNER(D) DECIDES TO RUN FOR SHERIFF, THE BLOGGER INTENDS TO TOSS HIS HAT IN THE RING.  THE CITIZENS OF MEDINA COUNTY DESERVE MORE THAN THE LIKES OF "I DUNNO MILLER" AND PINOCCHIO "DESK JOCKEY" CENTNER(D).

IT WILL SOON BE TIME TO REPLACE THESE INCOMPETENT GOOD OLD BOYS WITH SOMEONE WHO POSSESSES BOTH CREDIBLE LAW ENFORCEMENT EXPERIENCE AND INTEGRITY, QUALITIES NOT PRESENTLY TO BE FOUND AT THE MEDINA COUNTY SHERIFF'S OFFICE! 

THE BLOGGER MUST APOLOGIZE TO THE MACRON FAMILY, WHOM HE HAS FULLY APPRISED OF ALL ONGOING DEVELOPMENTS (UNLIKE THE SHERIFF'S OFFICE) FOR HAVING TAKEN SO LONG TO PROPERLY FOCUS THE BLOGGER'S INDEPENDENT INVESTIGATION INTO BRYON'S MURDER.

AS FOR THE INDIVIDUAL(S) RESPONSIBLE FOR THE DEATH OF BRYON MACRON, IT IS NOW SIMPLY A MATTER OF TIME.

THE BLOGGER REFUSES TO RESPOND TO THE VEILED THREATS AND ATTEMPTED INTIMIDATION BY LYING CENTNER(D), ONLY TO SAY THAT CENTNER(D)'S ATTEMPTS TO SUPPRESS INFORMATION ABOUT THE HOMICIDE OF BRYON MACRON IS OUTRAGEOUS AND UNCONSCIONABLE (AS IF HE EVEN HAS A CONSCIENCE, WHICH IS UNLIKELY).  

THE BLOGGER HAS DEALT WITH CORRUPT COPS BEFORE SO HE DOES NOT FIND THIS SITUATION TO BE PARTICULARLY UNIQUE!

THE BLOGGER'S INVESTIGATION OF THE HOMICIDE OF BRYON MACRON CONTINUES! 

AS FOR CENTNER(D), WHO COMES TO MEDINA COUNTY FROM THAT HOTBED OF CRIMINAL AND ORGANIZED GANG ACTIVITY, NORTH ROYALTON, THE PUBLIC WOULD HAVE BEEN BETTER SERVED IF HE HAD "KEPT HIS EYE" ON HIS OWN PERSONNEL WHO ARE "TASKED" WITH "INVESTIGATING" THE HOMICIDE OF BRYON MACRON, AND FLUBBED IT AT THAT!

OF COURSE, THERE IS NO CREDIBLE EVIDENCE THAT CENTNER(D) HAS EVER CONDUCTED A CRIMINAL INVESTIGATION. THEREFORE, ASKING HIM TO SUPERVISE THE SHERIFF'S "SUMMER'S EVE" DEFECTIVES IS NO MORE THAN ASKING THE BLIND TO LEAD THE BLIND!





Sunday, September 10, 2017

MEDINA SHERIFF "I DUNNO" MILLER REWARDS CRAPTAIN PINOCCHIO "DESK JOCKEY" CENTNER(D) FOR HIS VALIANT ATTEMPT TO BULLSHIT THE PUBLIC !!!

AS WE ALL KNOW, SHERIFF'S CRAPTAIN PINOCCHIO "DESK JOCKEY" CENTNER(D) GAVE A LESS THAN CONVINCING PERFORMANCE WHEN HE TRIED TO EXPLAIN AWAY THE HOMICIDE OF LAFAYETTE TOWNSHIP TRUSTEE BRYON MACRON BY ADVANCING HIS WALKING DEAD THEORY!

CENTNER(D)'S THEORY HAS MORE HOLES THAN A BLOCK OF WELL-AGED SWISS CHEESE.  IN FACT, NO ONE BELIEVES CENTNER(D)'S BULLSHIT ! 

THERE IS A BACK STORY WITH CENTNER(D) THAT THE BLOGGER WILL PRESENT IN A FUTURE POST AT THIS BLOG.  SUFFICE IT TO KNOW THAT PINOCCHIO "DESK JOCKEY" CENTNER(D) HAS HIS EYE ON THE NEXT ELECTION, HOPING TO WIN THE OFFICE OF SHERIFF!

THE LAST THING MEDINA COUNTY NEEDS IS ANOTHER BEAN-COUNTING DUMB F@@K FURTHER PERPETUATING EVEN MORE PUBLIC CORRUPTION!  

IT IS PRETTY CLEAR THAT, THROUGHOUT THE (NON)INVESTIGATION OF THE HOMICIDE OF LAFAYETTE TRUSTEE BRYON MACRON, CRAPTAIN PINOCCHIO "DESK JOCKEY" CENTNER(D) HAS PANDERED TO LAFAYETTE TRUSTEE LYNDA BOWERS,  A POWER PLAYER IN THE PUBIC WING OF THE MEDINA REPUBLICRAT PARTY!

GIVEN CENTER(D)'S BURNING DESIRE TO WIN THE OFFICE OF SHERIFF (HE WAS REJECTED BY ASTUTE VOTERS IN A PRIOR ATTEMPT) IT CERTAINLY APPEARS THAT THERE IS NOT MUCH HE WON'T DO TO GET THERE, INCLUDING COVERING UP AND WHITEWASHING THE HOMICIDE OF BRYON MACRON.

GIVEN THE FACT THAT CRAPTAIN PINOCCHIO "DESK JOCKEY" CENTNER(D) GAVE HIS BEST EFFORT IN AN ATTEMPT TO BULLSHIT THE PUBLIC, AS UNCONVINCING AS IT WAS, MEDINA COUNTY SHERIFF "I DUNNO" MILLER HAS REWARDED CENTNER(D) WITH A RESERVED AND DEDICATED PARKING SPACE IN THE PARKING LOT OF THE SHERIFF'S OFFICE LOCATED OVER AT PETTICOAT JUNCTION.

CENTNER(D)'S DEDICATED PARKING SPACE IS PICTURED BELOW.





AT LONG LAST CRAPTAIN PINOCCHIO "DESK JOCKEY" CENTNER(D) HAS RECEIVED THE RECOGNITION HE DESERVES AS THE SHERIFF'S OFFICE #1 DOUCHEBAG!


Thursday, September 7, 2017

SHERIFF'S CRAPTAIN PINOCCHIO CENTNER(D) OBVIOUSLY ONE OF THE WALKING DEAD !!!

THE BLOGGER CONTINUES TO BE AMAZED THAT SHERIFF'S CRAPTAIN PINOCCHIO CENTNER(D) HAS TRIED SO HARD TO UNSUCCESSFULLY SELL THE OBVIOUS MYTH THAT HOMICIDE VICTIM BRYON MACRON TOOK HIS OWN LIFE BECAUSE OF A "LARGE AMOUNT OF DEBT."  PINOCCHIO CENTNER(D) EXPECTED THE PUBLIC TO SUBSCRIBE TO HIS WALKING DEAD THEORY AND ACCEPT THE PROPOSITION THAT BRYON MACRON CAST HIMSELF INTO CHIPPEWA LAKE AFTER HE DECEASED GIVEN THE FACT THAT THE CUYAHOGA COUNTY MEDICAL EXAMINER FOUND NO WATER IN  MR. MACRON'S AIRWAY AND LUNGS.

THE BLOGGER HAS TO WONDER WHY CENTNER(D) HAS TRIED SO HARD TO COVER UP AND WHITEWASH THE HOMICIDE OF BRYON MACRON BY ADVANCING HIS WALKING DEAD THEORY! WHERE WAS CENTNER(D) ON THE NIGHT OF DECEMBER 15, 2016, THE NIGHT THAT BRYON MACRON WENT MYSTERIOUSLY "MISSING," ONLY LATER TO HAVE BEEN RECOVERED FROM THE WATERS OF CHIPPEWA LAKE?

WHY HAS CENTER(D) TRIED SO HARD TO SELL THE PUBLIC ON HIS IMPOSSIBLE THEORY?  JUST WHAT DOES CENTNER(D) HAVE TO HIDE?  CERTAINLY, THE ABJECT FAILURE OF THE SHERIFF'S OFFICE TO CONDUCT ANY REASONABLE AND COMPETENT INVESTIGATION COMES AS NO SURPRISE TO THE PUBLIC.  THE MEDINA COUNTY SHERIFF'S OFFICE HAS A LONG AND STORIED HISTORY OF REPEATED F@@K-UPS OVER THE YEARS.

IF THE PUBLIC WERE TO BUY INTO PINOCCHIO CENTNER(D)'S BULLSHIT THEORY THAT BRYON MACRON WAS DRIVEN TO TAKE HIS OWN LIFE OVER A "LARGE AMOUNT OF DEBT," IT IS CLEAR THAT CENTNER(D) TOOK HIS OWN LIFE YEARS AGO AND IS HIMSELF AMONG THE WALKING DEAD!

LET'S EXAMINE THE TRUE FACTS!

THE BLOGGER HAS VOLUNTEERED HIS SERVICES TO THE MACRON FAMILY TO SOLVE BRYON MACRON'S HOMICIDE WHERE CENTNER(D) AND HIS COVEY OF DEFECTIVES HAVE FAILED, PERHAPS DELIBERATELY SO.  IN THE COURSE OF CONDUCTING A COMPETENT INVESTIGATION, BEYOND THE ABILITIES OF THE SHERIFF'S DEFECTIVES, THE BLOGGER HAS EXAMINED BRYON MACRON'S FINANCES.

BRYON MACRON DID NOT AMASS A "LARGE AMOUNT OF DEBT," AT LEAST NO MORE THAN A PARENT WITH THREE BEAUTIFUL DAUGHTERS,  ONE OF WHOM IS A COLLEGE STUDENT!

PINOCCHIO CENTNER(D), HOWEVER, WAS OBVIOUSLY OVERWHELMED BY PERSONAL DEBT, IN AN AMOUNT NO LESS THAN $133,200.00 PLUS INTEREST IN 2008 WHEN COUNTRYWIDE BANK FORECLOSED HIS HOME!

THE ACTUAL LAWSUIT, FILED BY COUNTRYWIDE BANK. FORECLOSING PINOCCHIO CENTER(D)'S RESIDENCE, IS SHOWN BELOW.






UNDER PINOCCHIO CENTNER(D)'S THEORY, CENTNER(D) WAS DRIVEN TO DESPAIR BY "A LARGE AMOUNT OF DEBT" AND TOOK HIS OWN LIFE.  UNLIKE BRYON MACRON, HOWEVER, CENTNER(D) DID NOT CAST HIMSELF INTO THE WATERS OF CHIPPEWA LAKE FOLLOWING HIS DEMISE.

IT IS OBVIOUS THAT, UNDER HIS OWN THEORY, CENTNER(D) HAS BEEN AMONG THE WALKING DEAD FOR THE LAST NINE YEARS.

THIS IS SIMPLY AMAZING, AND JUST AS BELIEVABLE AS PINOCCHIO CENTNER(D)'S THEORY OF THE HOMICIDE OF BRYON MACRON!!!

THESE ARE THE TRUE FACTS, UNLIKE THE PURE BULLSHIT THAT CENTNER(D) HAS TRIED TO SELL TO THE PUBLIC.

WHAT A MORON!

Sunday, September 3, 2017

DICKLESS TRACY SCREWS UP ANOTHER WET DREAM!!!

IT CERTAINLY APPEARS ON THE BASIS OF AVAILABLE INFORMATION THAT THE SHERIFF'S LEAD "SUMMER'S EVE" DEFECTIVE CAN SCREW UP A WET DREAM - AT MIDDAY!

THE BLOGGER JUST CANNOT MAKE THIS UP IN THE WILDEST FLIGHTS OF FANCY AND IMAGINATION!

THE BLOGGER IS AT A LOSS TO COMPREHEND THE TOTAL INCOMPETENCE OF DICKLESS TRACY, THE SHERIFF'S LEAD SO-CALLED "INVESTIGATOR."  IT HAS BECOME READILY APPARENT THAT DICKLESS LACKS THE CAPACITY TO WIPE HIS OWN ASS WITHOUT PROPER SUPERVISION (NOT THAT DICKLESS' SUPERVISORS ARE ANY BRIGHTER).

HERE'S THE LATEST SNAFU, COMPLIMENTS OF DICKLESS TRACY, WHO HAS UNDOUBTEDLY SCREWED UP MORE THAN ONE WET DREAM!

APPROXIMATELY ONE WEEK AGO, THE BLOGGER HAD THE PLEASURE OF SPEAKING TO A NUMBER OF LAFAYETTE TOWNSHIP FIREFIGHTERS WHO ARE REALLY DECENT PEOPLE AND CONCERNED CITIZENS.  DURING THAT CONVERSATION, THE BLOGGER LEARNED THAT DICKLESS TRACY WAS PUBLICLY SPEWING (NON)FACTS, RUMORS, AND SPECULATION ABOUT HIS (NON)INVESTIGATION, DISPARAGING THE REPUTATION OF THE HOMICIDE VICTIM, THE LATE LAFAYETTE TOWNSHIP TRUSTEE BRYON MACRON WITHOUT ANY FACTUAL SUPPORT.

THE BLOGGER CHOOSES TO NOT REPEAT DICKLESS TRACY'S IRRESPONSIBLE REMARKS AND RUMORS SO AS TO AVOID PERPETUATING DICKLESS' UTTERLY STUPID AND GROUNDLESS CONTENTIONS AS IF THIS MORON COULD FIND HIS ASS WITH BOTH HANDS.

MORE ALARMING, HOWEVER, AND AS UNBELIEVABLE AS IT MAY SEEM TO ANYONE WITH THE SLIGHTEST SCINTILLA OF COMMON SENSE, THE FIREFIGHTERS REPORTED THAT DICKLESS TRACY TOOK DNA SPECIMENS FROM LAFAYETTE FIREFIGHTERS. THE OBVIOUS GLARING ERROR IN GATHERING THE SPECIMENS IS THAT DICKLESS FAILED TO CHANGE STERILE GLOVES BETWEEN SWABS!!! 

ONE OF THE FIREFIGHTERS OBSERVED, RIGHTLY SO, "THE SPECIMENS ARE CONTAMINATED !"

A REAL HOMICIDE INVESTIGATOR FROM CLEVELAND WAS PRESENTED WITH THE SAME FACTS, THAT IS DICKLESS TRACY FAILED TO CHANGE STERILE GLOVES BETWEEN EACH DNA SPECIMEN.  BEFORE THE BLOGGER COULD FINISH THE SENTENCE, THE REAL HOMICIDE INVESTIGATOR COMPLETED THE BLOGGER'S SENTENCE, "HE CROSS-CONTAMINATED THE DNA SPECIMENS."

HERE'S A SUGGESTION TO DICKLESS TRACY, "NEXT TIME READ THE DIRECTIONS!"

THAT LAFAYETTE FIREFIGHTER WAS CORRECT!!!

CONFIRMED BY REAL POLICE, A BONA FIDE HOMICIDE INVESTIGATOR!!!

THE BLOGGER HAS RECEIVED CONFIRMATION FROM AN INDEPENDENT SOURCE THAT, INDEED, DICKLESS TRACY HAD CROSS-CONTAMINATED THE DNA SPECIMENS, JUST AS THE FIREFIGHTER AND THE REAL HOMICIDE INVESTIGATOR HAD PREDICTED.

OF COURSE, DICKLESS MADE THE USUAL HALF-ASSED EFFORT AND DID NOT COLLECT DNA SPECIMENS FROM ALL THE LAFAYETTE FIREFIGHTERS.  A TOKEN DISPLAY OF NON-EFFORT SOLELY FOR PUBLIC CONSUMPTION!

WHAT A JERK!

THE BLOGGER DOUBTS THAT DICKLESS TRACY POSSESSES THE QUALIFICATIONS TO SECURE PUBLIC EMPLOYMENT AS A SCHOOL CROSSING GUARD!  WHERE DO THEY COME UP WITH THESE DOLTS?

TIME FOR THE BLOGGER TO STEP UP TO THE PLATE!

WHILE THE BLOGGER DOES NOT WISH TO OFFEND THE SENSIBILITIES OF READERS, A CANDID ASSESSMENT IS IN ORDER.  THE "SUMMER'S EVE" DEFECTIVES, AND PARTICULARLY DICKLESS TRACY, HAVE TAKEN WHAT SHOULD HAVE BEEN A STRAIGHTFORWARD HOMICIDE INVESTIGATION AND TURNED IT  INTO ONE MAJOR CLUSTERFUCK!!!  

IT IS OBVIOUS TO THE BLOGGER THAT DICKLESS TRACY AND HIS COMPANION "SUMMER'S EVE" DEFECTIVES HAVE ABSOLUTELY NO IDEA WHAT THEY ARE DOING.

AFTER WATCHING THESE CLOWNS SCRAMBLE AROUND IN THE DARK FOR SEVERAL MONTHS WITH NO TANGIBLE RESULTS, THE BLOGGER HAS DECIDED TO USE HIS SKILLS AND EXPERTISE TO SOLVE THIS CRIME AND BRING THE OFFENDER(S) TO JUSTICE AT NO COST TO THE MACRON FAMILY OR TO TAXPAYERS.

VICTORIA MACRON AND HER BEAUTIFUL DAUGHTERS WILL BE WAITING UNTIL THE COWS COME HOME IF THEY WAIT ON DICKLESS TRACY.  NO NEED FOR INEFFECTIVE "ASSISTANCE" OR INTERFERENCE FROM THE SHERIFF'S OFFICE.

IT IS TIME TO SHOW THESE DEFECTIVES HOW THE BIG BOYS DO IT.

THE BLOGGER WILL STEP OUT OF RETIREMENT AND IDENTIFY THE OFFENDER TO THE BENEFIT OF THE MACRON FAMILY AND COUNTY RESIDENTS.

NO SCREW-UPS, NO BULLSHIT, NO STALLING, NO INDECISION.  JUST RELIABLE, PROSECUTABLE  RESULTS!

JUSTICE DEMANDS IT!  THE MACRON FAMILY DESERVES IT!

THERE'S NO SUBSTITUTE FOR EXPERIENCE AND THE ABILITY TO REASON!

Tuesday, August 29, 2017

FEDERAL GRAND JURORS FOR A DAY !

THE BLOGGER HAS DECIDED TO PRESENT CERTAIN FACTS TO YOU, THE READERS, AND TO PERMIT YOU TO SIT AS JURORS FOR A DAY ON AN IMAGINARY FEDERAL GRAND JURY PANEL.

AS GRAND JURORS FOR A DAY, YOU WILL HAVE TO CONSIDER THE FACTS AND APPLY THEM TO THE LAW, ULTIMATELY DECIDING WHETHER MEDINA COUNTY SHERIFF "I DUNNO" MILLER, CRAPTAIN PINOCCHIO "DESK JOCKEY" CENTNER,  AND MILLER'S COVEY OF "SUMMER'S EVE" DEFECTIVES SHOULD STAND TRIAL IN UNITED STATES DISTRICT COURT FOR HONEST SERVICES FRAUD IN VIOLATION OF TITLE 18, UNITED STATES CODE, SECTIONS 1343 & 1346.

THE FEDERAL LAW


18 U.S.C. § 1343 - U.S. Code - Unannotated Title 18. Crimes and Criminal Procedure § 1343. Fraud by wire, radio, or television

Whoever, having devised or intending to devise any scheme or artifice to defraud, or for obtaining money or property by means of false or fraudulent pretenses, representations, or promises, transmits or causes to be transmitted by means of wire, radio, or television communication in interstate or foreign commerce, any writings, signs, signals, pictures, or sounds for the purpose of executing such scheme or artifice, shall be fined under this title or imprisoned not more than 20 years, or both.  If the violation occurs in relation to, or involving any benefit authorized, transported, transmitted, transferred, disbursed, or paid in connection with, a presidentially declared major disaster or emergency (as those terms are defined in section 102 of the Robert T. Stafford Disaster Relief and Emergency Assistance Act (42 U.S.C. 5122)), or affects a financial institution, such person shall be fined not more than $1,000,000 or imprisoned not more than 30 years, or both.

18 U.S. Code § 1346 - Definition of “scheme or artifice to defraud”

For the purposes of this chapter, the term “scheme or artifice to defraud” includes a scheme or artifice to deprive another of the intangible right of honest services.
(Added Pub. L. 100–690, title VII, § 7603(a), Nov. 18, 1988102 Stat. 4508.)
THE ULTIMATE ISSUE UNDER FEDERAL LAW

THE ULTIMATE QUESTION BEFORE YOU, FEDERAL GRAND JURORS FOR THE DAY, IS WHETHER MEDINA COUNTY SHERIFF "I DUNNO" MILLER, CRAPTAIN PINOCCHIO "DESK JOCKEY" CENTNER,  AND MILLER'S COVEY OF "SUMMER'S EVE" DEFECTIVES HAVE RECEIVED COMPENSATION FROM TAXPAYERS FOR CONDUCTING A THOROUGH AND COMPETENT INVESTIGATION OF THE HOMICIDE OF LAFAYETTE TOWNSHIP TRUSTEE BRYON MACRON, AND WHETHER, THROUGH A LACK OF DUE DILIGENCE, THEY HAVE DEPRIVED THE MACRON FAMILY AND, IN FACT, ALL OF THE CITIZENS OF MEDINA COUNTY OF HONEST SERVICES THAT MIGHT ORDINARILY BE EXPECTED OF SIMILARLY SITUATED INDIVIDUALS, SUCH AS REAL POLICE LIKE THE HOMICIDE INVESTIGATORS IN THE EMPLOY OF THE CLEVELAND POLICE DEPARTMENT ?

IF YOU, THE FEDERAL GRAND JURORS, ANSWER "YES," TO THE ABOVE QUESTION, YOU SHOULD VOTE TO RETURN A FEDERAL INDICTMENT CHARGING MEDINA COUNTY SHERIFF "I DUNNO" MILLER, CRAPTAIN PINOCCHIO "DESK JOCKEY" CENTNER,  AND MILLER'S COVEY OF "SUMMER'S EVE" DEFECTIVES WITH HONEST SERVICES FRAUD, IN VIOLATION OF TITLE 18, STATES CODE, SECTIONS 1341 & 1346.  THE RETURN OF A FEDERAL INDICTMENT WILL COMPEL THEM TO STAND TRIAL IN THE UNITED STATES DISTRICT COURT FOR THE CHARGED OFFENSE(S).

THE FACTS

BRYON MACRON "DISAPPEARED" UNDER "MYSTERIOUS CIRCUMSTANCES" FROM THE PREMISES OF THE LAFAYETTE TOWNSHIP ADMINISTRATION BUILDING DURING THE MORNING HOURS OF DECEMBER 16, 2016.  THE BLOODY SCENE WAS DISCOVERED BY LAFAYETTE SERVICE DIRECTOR RICHARD EVANS WHO MADE CERTAIN NOTIFICATIONS.

LATER ON DECEMBER 16, 2016, BRYON MACRON'S AUTO, PRESENTING EVIDENCE OF BLOOD, WAS LOCATED IN THE BEACHSIDE BLVD. PARKING AREA AT CHIPPEWA LAKE WITH THE ASSISTANCE OF ONSTAR.

ONE OF THE SHERIFF'S DE(PEW)TIES SEARCHED THE ABANDONED AUTO AND FOUND A KNIFE AND A PAIR OF GLOVES BENEATH THE SEAT OF MR. MACRON'S AUTO.  IN ACCORD WITH THE SHERIFF'S EVIDENCE PROTOCOL, THE UNNAMED DE(PEW)TY PROMPTLY THREW THE KNIFE AND GLOVES INTO A DUMPSTER. THIS MORON IS NEXT IN LINE FOR PINOCCHIO CENTNER'S POSITION WHEN CENTNER RETIRES FROM HIS POSITION AS THE SOCIAL MEDIA MONITOR AT THE SHERIFF'S OFFICE.

ASIDE FROM BLOOD WITHIN MR. MACRON'S AUTO, NO FOOTSTEPS OR BLOOD TRAIL WERE FOUND EXITING AND PROCEEDING AWAY FROM THE AUTO.

THE SHERIFF'S "SUMMER'S EVE" DEFECTIVES, WHO HAVE LIKELY NEVER BEFORE ENCOUNTERED A HOMICIDE SCENE LACKING A BODY, CONCLUDED THAT THE BLOODY SCENE AT THE LAFAYETTE ADMIN BUILDING HAD BEEN "STAGED" AND REPORTED TO THE MEDIA THAT BRYON MACRON HAD FLED AND ASSUMED A NEW LIFE IN CALIFORNIA.
REPORTED AT WKYC. COM AT http://www.wkyc.com/news/local/medina-county/plot-thickens-in-case-of-missing-medina-county-man/376895914
"Some investigators believe he left to start a new life in California."
ON FEBRUARY 21, 2017, THE MORTAL REMAINS OF BRYON MACRON WERE RECOVERED FROM THE WATERS OF CHIPPEWA LAKE DEFEATING UNSUPPORTED CLAIMS FROM THE SHERIFF'S "SUMMER'S EVE" DEFECTIVES THAT MR. MACRON HAD BEEN ALL THE WHILE SURFING ON CALIFORNIA'S PACIFIC COAST.

WKYC SUED MEDINA COUNTY FOR A REVIEW OF THE PRELIMINARY AUTOPSY REPORT THAT COUNTY "OFFICIALS" REFUSED TO DISCLOSE TO MR. MACRON'S WIFE.  PRELIMINARY AUTOPSY RESULTS DISCLOSED NO WATER IN MR. MACRON'S AIRWAY AND LUNGS, AND A NUMBER OF STAB WOUNDS INFLICTED UPON MR, MACRON ABOUT THE FACE, NECK, SHOULDERS, AND ARMS.

THE FAILURE TO SEARCH FOR BRYON MACRON ON THE DATE OF HIS REPORTED "DISAPPEARANCE" AND AFTER

THE AVERAGE CITIZEN MIGHT REASONABLY EXPECT LAW ENFORCEMENT TO ORGANIZE A SEARCH FOR A PERSON MISSING UNDER MYSTERIOUS CIRCUMSTANCES.

NOT ONLY DID THE SHERIFF'S OFFICE FAIL TO ORGANIZE AND CONDUCT A SEARCH FOR BRYON, THEY IMPEDED OTHER QUALIFIED INDIVIDUALS FROM DOING SO! 

THE BLOGGER HAS RECEIVED A REPORT THAT A HIGHWAY PATROL PILOT OVERFLYING CHIPPEWA LAKE ON DECEMBER 16, 2016 WAS ASTOUNDED BY THE LACK OF A SEARCH PARTY AT AND AROUND CHIPPEWA LAKE, EVEN A STATE TROOPER, WHOSE PRIMARY JOB OBJECTIVE IS TO ENFORCE TRAFFIC LAWS, RECOGNIZED THIS OBVIOUS FAILURE TO TAKE ANY ACTION TO SEARCH FOR BRYON MACRON ON THE DATE OF HIS "DISAPPEARANCE."

IN THE FIRST INSTANCE, LAFAYETTE TOWNSHIP FIRE SERVICE PERSONNEL WERE PREPARED TO SEARCH THE OPEN WATERS OF CHIPPEWA LAKE FOR BRYON MACRON.
SHERIFF'S PERSONNEL BARRED THE LAFAYETTE FIRE CHIEF FROM SEARCHING THE WATERS OF CHIPPEWA LAKE FOR BRYON MACRON ON DECEMBER 16, 2016, THE DATE OF MR. MACRON'S DISAPPEARANCE.

DO YOU, THE GRAND JURORS, BELIEVE THE MEDINA COUNTY SHERIFF FAILED TO DELIVER HONEST SERVICES TO THE MACRON FAMILY AND THE CITIZENS OF MEDINA COUNTY BY BARRING LAFAYETTE FIRE SERVICE FIRE PERSONNEL FROM SEARCHING THE OPEN WATERS OF CHIPPEWA LAKE FOR BRYON MACRON ON THE DATE OF HIS REPORTED DISAPPEARANCE ?

THIS OBSTRUCTION OF ATTEMPTS TO LOCATE BRYON MACRON WAS JUST THE FIRST OF A SERIES OF EVENTS INTENDED TO PREVENT THE LOCATION AND RECOVERY OF MR. MACRON'S MORTAL REMAINS BY THE MEDINA COUNTY SHERIFF!

AMERICAN WARRIOR ALLIANCE, MISSING WARRIORS SEARCH OF WASHINGTON, D.C. OFFERED TO SEND A HIGHLY TRAINED CANINE AND EXPERT HANDLER TO SEARCH FOR BRYON MACRON  AFTER HE WENT "MISSING."  THE MEDINA COUNTY SHERIFF'S OFFICE REFUSED THEIR OFFER OF ASSISTANCE.

RESCUE 101 SEARCH & RESCUE, JOHNSTOWN, OHIO PREPARED TO SEND A NUMBER OF TRAINED CANINES AND SEARCH PERSONNEL TO SEARCH FOR BRYON MACRON AFTER HE WENT "MISSING."  THE ORGANIZATION PLACED TWO TELEPHONE CALLS TO THE SHERIFF'S OFFICE TO OFFER THEIR EXPERT ASSISTANCE.  THOSE PHONE CALLS WERE NOT RETURNED.  EVENTUALLY, ON DECEMBER 31, 2016 (NEW YEAR'S EVE) THE ORGANIZATION PLACED A THIRD TELEPHONE CALL TO THE SHERIFF'S OFFICE TO ADVISE THEIR PERSONNEL WERE LEAVING FOR MEDINA COUNTY. THIS THIRD PHONE CALL DREW A RESPONSE FROM SHERIFF'S PERSONNEL WHO ADVISED THAT THEY WERE NOT WELCOME IN MEDINA COUNTY AND TO NOT COME.

DO YOU, THE GRAND JURORS, BELIEVE THE MEDINA COUNTY SHERIFF FAILED TO DELIVER HONEST SERVICES TO THE MACRON FAMILY AND THE CITIZENS OF MEDINA COUNTY BY REFUSING EXPERT SEARCH ASSISTANCE FROM THE AMERICAN WARRIOR ALLIANCE AND RESCUE 101 SEARCH & RESCUE WHEN THE MORTAL REMAINS OF BRYON MACRON HAD NOT YET BEEN RECOVERED?

A MACRON FAMILY FRIEND OFFERED TO PROVIDE THE SERVICES OF AN INDIVIDUAL WHO WAS PREPARED TO SEARCH CHIPPEWA LAKE WITH SIDE SCAN SONAR IN AN ATTEMPT TO LOCATE THE MORTAL REMAINS OF BRYON MACRON IN THE WATERS OF CHIPPEWA LAKE.  ONCE AGAIN, THE SHERIFF'S OFFICE BARRED THE SEARCH AS UNWELCOME!

DO YOU, THE GRAND JURORS, BELIEVE THE MEDINA COUNTY SHERIFF FAILED TO DELIVER HONEST SERVICES TO THE MACRON FAMILY AND THE CITIZENS OF MEDINA COUNTY BY REFUSING EXPERT SEARCH ASSISTANCE FROM AN INDIVIDUAL WHO OFFERED TO SEARCH THE WATERS OF CHIPPEWA LAKE FOR THE MORTAL REMAINS OF BRYON MACRON ?

THE SLIPSHOD PURPORTED "INVESTIGATION" OF THE HOMICIDE OF BRYON MACRON

AS AN INITIAL MATTER, READERS SHOULD BE INFORMED THAT THE SHERIFF, OR HIS DESIGNEE, ASSIGNED "SUMMER'S EVE" DEFECTIVE DICKLESS TRACY TO "LEAD" THE NON-EFFORT INTO THE HOMICIDE OF BRYON MACRON THAT THE SHERIFF'S PRINCIPAL BEAN COUNTER, CRAPTAIN PINOCCHIO "DESK JOCKEY" CENTNER HAS UNSUCCESSFULLY ATTEMPTED TO PASS OFF AS AN "INVESTIGATION."

GIVEN THE FACT THAT DICKLESS TRACY HAS DONE LITTLE OR NOTHING TO RESOLVE THE HOMICIDE OF BRYON MACRON, THE MOST REASONABLE APPROACH AT THE MOMENT IS TO LOOK AT JUST WHAT DICKLESS TRACY HAS NOT DONE TO SOLVE THIS HOMICIDE.

DICKLESS TRACY AND THE COVEY OF OTHER OF THE SHERIFF'S "SUMMER'S EVE" DEFECTIVE FAILED TO INTERVIEW BRYON MACRON'S WIFE, AT ANY TIME, UP TO AND INCLUDING THE PRESENT DATE.  MOREOVER, THIS SAME GROUP OF DEFECTIVES FAILED TO INTERVIEW ANY OTHER MACRON FAMILY MEMBERS OR ANY OF BRYON'S FRIENDS AND ASSOCIATES,  AT LEAST NONE OF BRYON'S FRIENDS AND ASSOCIATES WHOM THE BLOGGER HAS INTERVIEWED.

DO YOU, THE GRAND JURORS, BELIEVE THE MEDINA COUNTY SHERIFF FAILED TO DELIVER HONEST SERVICES TO THE MACRON FAMILY AND THE CITIZENS OF MEDINA COUNTY BY FAILING TO INTERVIEW THE WIFE, OTHER FAMILY MEMBERS, AND FRIENDS OR ASSOCIATES OF BRYON MACRON WHEN HE FIRST DISAPPEARED AND FAILED TO INQUIRE AS TO WHAT MAY HAVE BEEN GOING ON IN BRYON'S LIFE THAT MAY HAVE CONTRIBUTED TO HIS "DISAPPEARANCE" AND MURDER?

THE BLOGGER PRESENTED A SURE-FIRE ROAD MAP TO THESE MEDINA COUNTY SHERIFF'S DEFECTIVES BY DOING NO MORE THAN IDENTIFYING THE CELL PHONE PINGS FROM THE SAME CELL TOWER(S) THAT BRYON'S CELL PHONE HAD BEEN PINGING.

SEE PRIOR POST AT THIS BLOG CAPTIONED HERE'S A ROAD MAP TO SOLVE THE HOMICIDE OF LAFAYETTE TOWNSHIP TRUSTEE BRYON MACRON easily found at http://medinacorruption.blogspot.com/2017/05/heres-road-map-to-solve-homicide-of.html

THESE "SUMMER'S EVE" DEFECTIVES FAILED TO FOLLOW AND TAKE THE EASIEST ROUTE TO SOLVING THE HOMICIDE OF BRYON MACRON. TOO MUCH WORK AND INTERFERES WITH DONUT RUNS!  INSTEAD, THESE MEDINA MORONS CHOSE TO FORGO ANY REAL INVESTIGATIVE WORK AND CHOSE TO TAKE THE EASIEST ROUTE OUT OF THIS CONUNDRUM BY SIMPLY DECLARING BRYON MACRON TOOK HIS OWN LIFE AND SWEEPING BRYON MACRON'S HOMICIDE UNDER THE RUG ! THAT IS BOTH PATHETIC AND SHOCKING TO REALIZE THE MURDER OF AN INNOCENT PUBLIC SERVANT IS SO EASILY DISMISSED AS A NON-EVENT!

DO YOU, THE GRAND JURORS, BELIEVE THE MEDINA COUNTY SHERIFF FAILED TO DELIVER HONEST SERVICES TO THE MACRON FAMILY AND THE CITIZENS OF MEDINA COUNTY BY FAILING TO OBTAIN THE CELL PHONE PINGS OF THE HOMICIDE SUSPECT FROM CELL TOWER PROVIDERS AND CORRELATE THEM TO THE EXTENT THAT WOULD PERMIT IDENTIFICATION OF THE PSYCHOPATH WHO MURDERED BRYON MACRON ?

MEDIA REPORTS INDICATE DICKLESS TRACY TOOK DNA SPECIMENS FROM LAFAYETTE TOWNSHIP EMPLOYEES, AND THAT ONLY FOR PUBLIC CONSUMPTION. WHAT THE MEDIA HAS NOT REPORTED IS THAT DICKLESS TRACY DID NOT TAKE DNA SPECIMENS FROM ALL LAFAYETTE TOWNSHIP EMPLOYEES AND PERSONNEL.

MOREOVER THE MEDIA HAS NOT REPORTED  THAT DICKLESS TRACY FAILED TO CHANGE HIS STERILE GLOVES BETWEEN EACH SPECIMEN THUS CROSS-CONTAMINATING EACH AND EVERY DNA SPECIMEN HE TOOK,  RENDERING THEM ALL USELESS !

DO YOU, THE GRAND JURORS, BELIEVE THE MEDINA COUNTY SHERIFF FAILED TO DELIVER HONEST SERVICES TO THE MACRON FAMILY AND THE CITIZENS OF MEDINA COUNTY BY CROSS-CONTAMINATING DNA SPECIMENS TAKEN FROM LAFAYETTE TOWNSHIP EMPLOYEES AND PERSONNEL AND BY FURTHER FAILING TO PROPERLY TAKE SUBSEQUENT UNCONTAMINATED DNA SAMPLES FROM THOSE SAME INDIVIDUALS; AND BY ULTIMATELY FAILING TO COMPARE ANY AND ALL DNA SPECIMENS RECOVERED FROM THE CRIME SCENE(S) WITH KNOWN DNA SEQUENCES OF LAFAYETTE TOWNSHIP EMPLOYEES AND PERSONNEL ?

ON THE ULTIMATE ISSUE

WHILE THE GOVERNMENT IS NOT REQUIRED TO PRESENT ALL OF ITS EVIDENCE TO YOU, THE GRAND JURORS, THE GOVERNMENT MUST PRESENT SUFFICIENT EVIDENCE TO CONVINCE YOU THAT A FEDERAL CRIME HAS PROBABLY BEEN COMMITTED AND THE NAMED PERSONS PROBABLY COMMITTED THE OFFENSE.

DO YOU, FEDERAL GRAND JURORS FOR THE DAY, FIND THAT MEDINA COUNTY SHERIFF "I DUNNO" MILLER, CRAPTAIN PINOCCHIO "DESK JOCKEY" CENTNER,  AND MILLER'S COVEY OF "SUMMER'S EVE" DEFECTIVES DEPRIVED BRYON MACRON, THE MACRON FAMILY, AND THE CITIZENS OF MEDINA COUNTY WITH HONEST SERVICES WHILE RECEIVING PAYROLL PAYMENTS DERIVED FROM TAXPAYERS, PAID IN EXCHANGE FOR HONEST SERVICES, IN VIOLATION OF TITLE 18, UNITED STATES CODE, SECTIONS 1343 & 1346.

HOW SAY YOU?

Saturday, August 26, 2017

A CRITICAL ANALYSIS OF THE HOMICIDE OF LAFAYETTE TOWNSHIP TRUSTEE BRYON MACRON FROM MEDIA REPORTING!

THIS IS A GOOD OPPORTUNITY TO REVIEW THE "NEWS" COVERAGE PERTAINING TO THE OBVIOUS HOMICIDE OF LAFAYETTE TOWNSHIP TRUSTEE BRYON MACRON, WHO DID NOT FLEE TO CALIFORNIA AS "SOME ["SUMMER'S EVE"] INVESTIGATORS BELIEVE."

IN ONE HYPOCRITICAL SELF-SERVING PUBLISHED COMMENT THAT LYNDA BOWERS RELEASED TO THE NEWS MEDIA, SHOWN BELOW, BOWERS MADE TO FOLLOWING UNSUPPORTED CLAIM:
"However, amid rumors and growing social media speculation we believe our residents deserve a higher level of communication.”
PURELY UNADULTERATED BULLSHIT!

THAT ALLEGED "HIGHER LEVEL OF COMMUNICATION" DOES NOT EXTEND TO A COMPETENT INVESTIGATION INTO THE HOMICIDE OF BRYON MACRON!

 BOWERS  AND HER CONTINGENT OF FAITHFUL FOLLOWERS IN LAFAYETTE TOWNSHIP HAVE REFUSED TO COOPERATE WITH INDEPENDENT AND HONEST INVESTIGATION OF THE HOMICIDE OF THE LATE BRYON MACRON, EVEN AS THE PSYCHOPATH WHO MURDERED BRYON MACRON WALKS FREELY AMONG THEM AND THE RESIDENTS OF LAFAYETTE TOWNSHIP.  ADDING INSULT TO INJURY, THE COMEDY DUO OF BOWERS AND COSTELLO OBVIOUSLY ENDORSE THE COVERUP OF THE MURDER OF BRYON MACRON BY MEDINA COUNTY SHERIFF "I DUNNO" MILLER AND HIS CHIEF SPOKESMAN AND BEAN COUNTER, CRAPTAIN PINOCCHIO "DESK JOCKEY" CENTNER.

TO DEMONSTRATE HOW SHARP CENTNER IS, AT THE "PRESS CONFERENCE" ANNOUNCING THE CORONER'S RULING AS TO THE CAUSE AND MANNER OF BRYON MACRON'S DEATH ("UNDETERMINED" AND "UNDETERMINED") PINOCCHIO CENTNER MADE MORE THAN ONE CONFLICTING AND PREPOSTEROUS STATEMENT.

AMONG THE MORE ASTOUNDING STATEMENTS MADE BY PINOCCHIO CENTNER WAS THAT, ON THE ONE HAND, "NO OTHER PERSON WAS INVOLVED IN MR. MACRON'S DEATH," WHILE, ON THE OTHER HAND, CENTNER CLAIMED THIS CASE REMAINS "ACTIVE AND OPEN."

PINOCCHIO CENTNER STEPPED ON HIS FORESKIN WITH THOSE COMMENTS!

WHY WOULD CENTNER'S "SUMMER'S EVE" DEFECTIVES CONTINUE TO "INVESTIGATE" A MATTER THEY DEEMED TO BE A "SUICIDE" AS EARLY AS DECEMBER 16, 2016, THE DATE ON WHICH BRYON MACRON WAS REPORTED "MISSING." 

NO ONE IS BUYING THAT BULLSHIT AT ALL!  

NO ONE BELIEVES THAT BRYON MACRON COMMITTED SUICIDE AND NO ONE BELIEVES THAT THE SHERIFF CONDUCTED ANY COMPETENT INVESTIGATION INTO BRYON'S HOMICIDE!

SHERIFF "I DUNNO" MILLER DECIDED TO COVER UP BRYON MACRON'S HOMICIDE FROM THE OUTSET!

PUBLISHED ONLINE AT FOX8 NEWS WEBSITE ON FEBRUARY 23, 2017, FOUND AT http://fox8.com/2017/02/23/lafayette-township-trustees-our-hearts-are-broken-over-death-of-bryon-macron/

"Medina County Coroner Dr. Lisa Deranek said a preliminary autopsy is complete, but toxicology results will take another two to three weeks. She said it was very difficult to determine how long Macron's body was in the water."

CLEVELAND.COM REPORTS:
"The preliminary autopsy report reviewed Thursday by cleveland.com also revealed that Macron had no water or foreign materials in his airways meaning he likely wasn't breathing before his body went into the water."
FOUND ONLINE AT http://www.cleveland.com/medina/index.ssf/2017/04/six_stab_wounds_deepen_the_mys.html 


PUBLISHED COMMENT BY LINDA BOWERS:
“Similarly, there is no evidence to support the rumor that the Nexus project is in any way connected to Bryon’s disappearance. Since Bryon went missing on the morning of December 16, we have respected the request of law enforcement to refrain from comment on the Macron case. 
However, amid rumors and growing social media speculation we believe our residents deserve a higher level of communication.”
FOUND AT FOX8 NEWS WEBSITE http://fox8.com/2017/01/05/lafayette-trustees-speak-out-urge-anyone-with-info-on-missing-trustee-to-call-police/

“The rumor that township funds are missing is false,” the letter states. “Similarly, there is no evidence to support the rumor that the Nexus project is in any way connected to Bryon’s disappearance."


REPORTED AT WKYC. COM AT http://www.wkyc.com/news/local/medina-county/plot-thickens-in-case-of-missing-medina-county-man/376895914
"Some investigators believe he left to start a new life in California."

THE BLOGGER, UNLIKE THE SHERIFF'S "SUMMER'S EVE" DEFECTIVES, IS POSITIVE THAT BRYON MACRON IS NOT PRESENTLY, NOR WAS HE EVER IN DECEMBER 2016 AND THEREAFTER, SURFING ON CALIFORNIA'S PACIFIC COAST! 

Tuesday, August 22, 2017

PINOCCHIO CENTNER CELEBRATES THE ECLIPSE FROM THE PARKING LOT AT PETTICOAT JUNCTION !!!!

MEDINA COUNTY SHERIFF'S CRAPTAIN PINOCCHIO CENTNER REPORTED TO HIS DESK JOB WITH GUSTO THIS MORNING.  

AFTER SHARPENING ANOTHER TWO DOZEN PENCILS, PINOCCHIO CENTNER MADE IMMEDIATE PREPARATIONS TO CELEBRATE THE MUCH HERALDED ECLIPSE.

INITIALLY, CENTNER DONNED HIS COMMAND PARADE UNIFORM, SHOWN BELOW, A DISPLAY OF SIMULATED TESTOSTERONE!




RECENT NEWS REPORTING HAS ABOUNDED WITH CAUTIONARY WARNINGS ABOUT LOOKING DIRECTLY AT THE SUN DURING THE ECLIPSE, WHICH MAY BE JUST ONE MORE SECONDARY HAZARD CAUSING CENTNER TO GO BLIND!

CENTNER, OF COURSE, HAS TAKEN ALL OF THE NECESSARY PRECAUTIONS.  IN THE FIRST INSTANCE, HE HAS SET ASIDE HIS NORMAL DESK JOCKEY EYEWEAR.
CENTNER HAS THEN OUTFITTED HIMSELF WITH THE OFFICIAL ECLIPSE-VIEWING SPECIALTY GLASSES, APPROVED BY NASA.




ONCE HE WAS PROPERLY ATTIRED, CENTNER MOUNTED HIS BEAN COUNTER TRANSPORT VEHICLE, WITH EXTRA-SOFT PLUSH SEATING, AND FOUND HIMSELF THE OPTIMAL SPOT IN THE PARKING LOT AT PETTICOAT JUNCTION WITH AN UNOBSTRUCTED VIEW OF THE IMPENDING ECLIPSE!

 WHEN THE ECLIPSE WAS FINALLY OVER, PINOCCHIO CENTNER WAS HEARD TO REMARK, "I HAVEN'T HAD THIS MUCH FUN SINCE I PRACTICED MY COMEDY ROUTINE AT THE PRESS CONFERENCE ANNOUNCING THE RELEASE OF BRYON MACRON'S AUTOPSY REPORT!"

THE BLOGGER BELIEVES ALL THE FUSS OVER THIS ECLIPSE AT PETTICOAT JUNCTION IS REALLY NOTHING MORE THAN MUCH ADO ABOUT NOTHING.  AFTER ALL, THESE MORONS ARE ALL WANDERING AROUND IN THE DARK ENDLESSLY, IMPROPERLY DISPOSING OF EVIDENCE AND IGNORING THE FACTS!

Saturday, August 19, 2017

LAFAYETTE TOWNSHIP TRUSTEES FULLY IN SUPPORT OF THE COVERUP OF THE MURDER OF BRYON MACRON !!!

LAFAYETTE TOWNSHIP TRUSTEES LYNDA BOWERS AND MICHAEL COSTELLO ARE FULLY IN SUPPORT OF THE COVERUP OF THE MURDER OF THE LATE TRUSTEE BRYON MACRON.  THESE ARE THE SAME PEOPLE ELECTED BY VOTERS TO REPRESENT THE VOTERS' INTERESTS.

JUST WHOSE INTERESTS ARE BOWERS AND COSTELLO REALLY REPRESENTING IN SUPPORT OF THE COVERUP OF THE HOMICIDE OF BRYON MACRON?  CERTAINLY NOT THE INTERESTS OF LAFAYETTE TOWNSHIP RESIDENTS WHO RIGHTFULLY HAVE AN INTEREST IN THE PROPER RESOLUTION OF THIS HOMICIDE AND THE PROSECUTION OF THE OFFENDER WHO, TO THIS DAY, WALKS FREELY AMONG THEM!

JUST WHO MAY BE THE NEXT TO DIE AT THE HANDS OF THIS PSYCHOPATHIC KILLER WHO MURDERED BRYON MACRON IN THE LAFAYETTE TOWNSHIP ADMINISTRATION BUILDING?  WILL IT BE LYNDA BOWERS OR MICHAEL COSTELLO ?

BOTH BOWERS AND COSTELLO, ALONG WITH OTHER TOWNSHIP EMPLOYEES HAVE REFUSED TO SPEAK WITH THE BLOGGER WHO IS COMMITTED TO SOLVING THIS CRIME AND BRINGING THE OFFENDER TO JUSTICE.

GIVEN THE REPORTS THE BLOGGER HAS RECEIVED THAT COSTELLO HAS NOT RESIDED IN HIS HOME SINCE BRYON MACRON'S MURDER, IT IS OBVIOUS THAT COSTELLO DOESN'T BUY INTO PINOCCHIO CENTNER'S UNFOUNDED "CONCLUSION" THAT BRYON MACRON TOOK HIS OWN LIFE, A THEORY CONTRARY TO THE UNDISPUTED FACTS.  OTHERWISE, WHY WOULD COSTELLO BE AFRAID TO LIVE IN HIS OWN HOME FOR MONTHS ON END?  FEAR OF THE BOGEYMAN?

THE ONLY CONCLUSION AT WHICH THE BLOGGER CAN ARRIVE IS THAT THE IMPORT OF WHATEVER BOWERS AND COSTELLO ARE TRYING TO CONCEAL FROM PUBLIC EXPOSURE MUST BE PRETTY POWERFUL GIVEN THEIR WILLINGNESS TO BRUSH ASIDE THE MURDER OF AN INNOCENT CITIZEN LIKE BRYON MACRON FOR THE SAKE OF POLITICAL EXPEDIENCE.

THE BLOGGER INTENDS TO EXPLORE THE REAL ESTATE "BUSINESS RELATIONSHIP" BETWEEN BOWERS AND COSTELLO IN FUTURE POSTS AT THIS BLOG!

MURDER AND COVERUP ARE NOTHING SHORT OF THE CONSEQUENCE OF CORRUPTION IN GOVERNMENT.

WELCOME TO MEDINA COUNTY WHERE YOU CAN COMMIT MURDER IN THE COUNTY, PARTICULARLY IN LAFAYETTE TOWNSHIP, AND ESCAPE THE CONSEQUENCES!

Wednesday, August 16, 2017

PINOCCHIO CENTNER TAKES CENTER STAGE TO AUDIENCE CRIES OF "DILDO" !!!

THE CURTAIN CAME DOWN ON THE MEDINA PLAYERS' PRODUCTION OF THE BOBBIT, WITH STRONG PERFORMANCES BY PHILANDERING, ILLEGITIMATE "jUDGE WEASELPECKER" COLLIER IN THE LEAD ROLE OF DILDO BAGGINS, THE PROTAGONIST.  EQUALLY IMPRESSIVE WAS THE STRONG PERFORMANCE OF "WEASLPECKER" COLLIER'S OFFICIAL COURT REPORTER (WITH BENEFITS) DONNA "HAVE IT YOUR WAY" GARRITY AS "WEASELPECKER'S" BIMBO,  IN THE ROLE OF BIMBO BAGGINS.

THE FINAL EVENING OF THE PRODUCTION, MET WITH A STANDING OVATION, WAS NOT WITHOUT INCIDENT, HOWEVER.  AS THE FINAL CURTAIN CAME DOWN, THE AUDIENCE LET OUT WITH CHANTS OF, "DILDO!  DILDO! DILDO!"

IN AN EMBARRASSING MOMENT, EVEN BEFORE THE ENTIRE CAST HAD ASSEMBLED FOR THE CURTAIN CALL, PINOCCHIO CENTNER, A PENCIL-PUSHING DESK JOCKEY AT THE SHERIFF'S OFFICE DARTED ONTO THE STAGE IN THE MISTAKEN BELIEF THE AUDIENCE WAS CALLING FOR HIS APPEARANCE, AND UNDERSTANDABLY SO.

AS IT TURNS OUT, CENTNER HAD BEEN AN UNDERSTUDY FOR "WEASELPECKER" COLLIER IN THE ROLE OF DILDO BAGGINS!

FOLLOWING THE CURTAIN CALL, THE MEDIA CRITIC FROM THE MEDINA GASSETTE SOUGHT COMMENT FROM "WEASELPECKER" COLLIER ABOUT CENTNER'S OBVIOUS FAUX PAS.

"WEASELPECKER" COLLIER, TRYING TO SMOOTH IT ALL OVER, SIMPLY CALLED IT ALL A COLOSSAL MISTAKE, CITING TO THE FACT THAT CENTNER HAD BEEN HIS UNDERSTUDY AND DESERVED SOME RECOGNITION AS A DILDO !  "NO HARM DONE THOUGH," SAID "WEASELPECKER."  '"I AM CONFIDENT THAT CENTNER MAY VERY WELL LAND THE LEAD ROLE OF DILDO BAGGINS IN THE EVENT WE  SHOULD REPRISE THE PRODUCTION.  I KNOW OF NO ONE ELSE MORE QUALIFIED TO PLAY THE LEAD ROLE OF THE DILDO IN THE WHOLE OF MEDINA COUNTY.  BESIDES, IT WILL GIVE HIM THE OPPORTUNITY TO GET OFF HIS DEAD ASS AND FROM BEHIND HIS DESK.  BEING A DESK JOCKEY, LIKE CENTNER IS, TENDS TO WARP THE PERSPECTIVE OF THE REALITIES OF THE ACTUAL NEEDS OF THE COMMUNITY!"

SO, "WEASELPECKER" COLLIER HAS GRACEFULLY PASSED THE BATON TO PINOCCHIO CENTNER, FROM ONE DILDO TO ANOTHER.

BRAVO !!!

Saturday, August 12, 2017

LAFAYETTE TOWNSHIP: A GOOD PLACE TO GET AWAY WITH MURDER!

ONCE THE DRUG DEALERS IN CLEVELAND AND AKRON GET WIND OF THE FACT THAT HOMICIDES COMMITTED IN LAFAYETTE TOWNSHIP, THE "SUICIDE" RATE IN LAFAYETTE TOWNSHIP IS CERTAINLY TO RISE DRAMATICALLY!

IN FACT, THE NUMBER OF DRUG DEALERS RELOCATING TO LAFAYETTE TOWNSHIP IS BOUND TO GROW EXPONENTIALLY!

SOON, LAFAYETTE TOWNSHIP WILL BE THE NEW SHOWPLACE OF DOPER RIDES, CUSTOM PAINT JOBS, GOLD LOW-RIDER RIMS, AND 1,000,000 DECIBEL AMPLIFIERS TO ENTERTAIN THE NEIGHBORS WITH RAP MUSIC.

IT SOUNDS LIKE PARADISE DOESN'T IT?

CONSIDER THE FOLLOWING HYPOTHETICAL.

MAURICE, A CLEVELAND DRUG DEALER WITH MANY COMPETITIVE ENEMIES, DECIDES THAT IT IS GOOD FOR BUSINESS TO MOVE TO LAFAYETTE TOWNSHIP TO AVOID THE PRYING EYES OF REAL POLICE.

MAURICE DECIDES TO BUILD A HOME, VALUED AT $850,000, NEAR THE PRESENT LOCATION OF INNOVATION PARK.  NOW MAURICE, LIKE ALL ACCOMPLISHED DRUG DEALERS, HAS A PENCHANT FOR FULLY AUTOMATIC WEAPONS SO AS TO BEST THE COMPETITION.  MAURICE, OF COURSE, NEEDS A FAIRLY LARGE RURAL PROPERTY WITH AMPLE ROOM TO FIRE HIS AUTOMATIC WEAPONS IN THE COURSE OF TARGET PRACTICE.

AFTER MAURICE'S HOME IS FINALLY CONSTRUCTED AND FITTED WITH SECURITY CAMERAS, MAURICE DECIDES HE NEEDS TO HAVE A FEW PETS AROUND HIS RURAL PROPERTY. MAURICE THEN GOES TO THE APL AND "ADOPTS" SIX FULLY GROWN PIT BULL CANINES, ALL PREVIOUSLY QUARANTINED FOLLOWING ATTACKS ON HUMANS.  ACTUALLY, MAURICE DECIDES TO FORM A NON-PROFIT PIT BULL RESCUE AND RECEIVES A TAX ABATEMENT FROM BETHANY DENTLER, THE DE FACTO MAYOR OF MEDINA COUNTY, WITH THE FULL APPROVAL OF LAFAYETTE TRUSTEE LYNDA BOWERS.  AFTER ALL, THE FIRST AND ONLY TIME MAURICE VOTED IN ANY ELECTION, HE DECLARED HIMSELF TO BE A REPUBLICRAT.

NEIGHBORS EVENTUALLY BECOME CONCERNED THAT THEY HEAR GUNSHOTS COMING FROM THE DIRECTION OF MAURICE'S HOUSE AT ALL HOURS OF THE DAY AND NIGHT, WHICH SHERIFF'S DE(PEW)TIES DISMISS AS NOTHING MORE THAN MAURICE AT TARGET PRACTICE AT 3:00 AM!

ON THE FOLLOWING DAY, SHERIFF'S DE(PEW)TIES RESPOND TO THE REPORT OF A BODY FOUND LYING ON THE BERM OF THE ROADWAY APPROXIMATELY 1 MILE SOUTH OF MAURICE'S HOME.

NEARBY, THEY FIND THE VICTIM'S ABANDONED BULLET-RIDDLED GOLD CADILLAC.

LAFAYETTE TOWNSHIP TRUSTEES ARE IMMEDIATELY NOTIFIED AND RESPOND PROMPTLY TO THE SCENE.  LYNDA BOWERS, AROUSED BY HER CURIOSITY, GOES THROUGH THE POCKETS OF THE VICTIM LOOKING FOR ANY "SECRET NOTES" WHILE THE DE(PEW)TIES LOOK ON,  JUST LIKE SHE RUMMAGED THROUGH THE CRIME SCENE AT THE LAFAYETTE ADMIN BUILDING ON DECEMBER 16, 2016, THE DATE OF THE REPORTED "DISAPPEARANCE" OF LAFAYETTE TOWNSHIP TRUSTEE BRYON MACRON, LOOKING FOR ANY "SECRET NOTE" THAT BRYON MAY HAVE LEFT BEHIND (THAT BY BOWERS' OWN ADMISSION).

AT ABOUT THAT TIME, SHERIFF "I DUNNO" MILLER AND CRAPTAIN PINOCCHIO CENTNER ARRIVE ON SCENE.  THE CORONER'S INVESTIGATOR INFORMS MILLER AND CENTNER THAT THE VICTIM SUSTAINED 14 BULLET WOUNDS, INCLUDING 6 IN THE BACK AND 2 AT THE BACK OF THE HEAD!

AFTER CONFERRING BRIEFLY, MILLER AND CENTNER COME TO MUTUAL AGREEMENT THAT THE VICTIM OBVIOUSLY COMMITTED SUICIDE!

AT A PRESS CONFERENCE HELD 8 MONTHS LATER, WHEN THE FINAL AUTOPSY REPORT IS RELEASED, CRAPTAIN PINOCCHIO CENTNER STANDS BEFORE THE NEWS CAMERAS AND BOLDLY DECLARES

"THIS IS THE MOST OBVIOUS CASE OF SUICIDE I HAVE EVER SEEN.  IN ALL OF MY MANY YEARS ON THIS JOB, SITTING BEHIND A DESK AND PUSHING A PENCIL, BELIEVE ME WHEN I SAY I HAVE READ A LOT OF SUICIDE REPORTS.

"WHILE THE CORONER HAS RULED THE CAUSE AND MANNER OF DEATH TO BE "UNDETERMINED," WE CANNOT RULE OUT THAT EUGENE SMITH, THE VICTIM, MAY HAVE DIED FROM SELF-INDUCED LEAD POISONING.

"DURING OUR EXTENSIVE INVESTIGATION, WE LEARNED THAT EUGENE INCURRED A LARGE AMOUNT OF DEBT AND ENGAGED IN ACTIVITIES UNKNOWN TO HIS FAMILY, BUT WE ARE NOT GOING TO GET INTO THAT.  WE DIDN'T SPEND A WHOLE LOT OF TIME INVESTIGATING IN MR. SMITH'S NEIGHBORHOOD BECAUSE OF ALL THOSE SCARY BLACK GUYS HANGING AROUND AND OUR SWAD (SPECIAL WEAPONS AND DONUTS) TEAM WASN'T AVAILABLE.

"IT IS CLEAR TO OUR FINE SQUAD OF "SUMMER'S EVE" DEFECTIVES THAT EUGENE SMITH WAS THE ONLY PERSON INVOLVED IN HIS DEATH."

LAFAYETTE TOWNSHIP, UNDER PRESENT CIRCUMSTANCES, IS SURE TO BECOME A DOPE DEALER'S NIRVANA WHERE YOU CAN COMMIT MURDER AND GET AWAY WITH IT!

Wednesday, August 9, 2017

IT'S TIME TO GO GREEN! A FISCALLY SOUND PROPOSAL SURELY TO BE A BOON TO LOCAL TAXPAYERS!

IT IS FINALLY TIME FOR MEDINA COUNTY GOVERNMENT TO MOVE INTO THE TWENTY-FIRST CENTURY AND GO GREEN! BURNING FOSSIL FUELS IS DEGRADING THE PLANET CONTRIBUTING TO GLOBAL CLIMATE CHANGE, WHICH BRINGS WITH IT RISING SEA LEVELS.  MEDINA COUNTY, LOCATED DEEP WITHIN THE LAWLESS LAKE ERIE BAYOU, WILL MOST CERTAINLY BE AFFECTED.

TOWARD THE END OF ACHIEVING SUSTAINABILITY AND SAVING THE PLANET, THE BLOGGER OFFERS UP THE FOLLOWING FISCALLY SOUND PROPOSAL THAT WILL BE A BOON TO LOCAL TAXPAYERS AND IN THE COURSE OF SO DOING, MAKE MEDINA COUNTY THE ENVY OF OTHER LOCAL GOVERNMENTS THROUGHOUT THE LAND SUCH AS COOK COUNTY, ILLINOIS AND DADE COUNTY, FLORIDA (BOTH OF WHICH, LIKE MEDINA COUNTY,  HAVE A RICH AND STORIED HISTORY OF PUBLIC CORRUPTION).

THE MEDINA GASSETTE, THE ORACLE OF THE MEDINA COUNTY REPUBLICRAT PARTY, HAS RECENTLY PUBLISHED A PENETRATING "INVESTIGATIVE" ARTICLE ANNOUNCING THAT SHERIFF "I DUNNO" MILLER'S CHIEF BEAN COUNTER AND DESK JOCKEY, CRAPTAIN PINOCCHIO CENTNER IS PREPARED TO APPROACH THE COUNTY COMMISSIONERS FOR MORE MONEY TO PURCHASE TWO NEW CARS FOR DONUT RUNS TO DUNKIN' DONUTS.

ACCORDING TO THE ARTICLE, PINOCCHIO CENTER IS PREPARED TO ARGUE THAT TWO CARS IN THE SHERIFF'S FLEET EACH HAVE IN EXCESS OF 200,000 MILES, THAT IS 400,000 MILES IN THE AGGREGATE.  CAN READERS IMAGINE JUST HOW MANY DONUT RUNS THESE CARS HAVE MADE TO DUNKIN' DONUTS?

THE ARTICLE GOES ON TO CITE PINOCCHIO CENTNER WHO CLAIMS THE REPLACEMENT COST OF EACH VEHICLE TO BE $40, 000 PER COPY, FOR THE TOTAL SUM OF $80,000, MORE OR LESS.

CAN YOU, THE READERS, IMAGINE HOW MANY DOZENS OF DONUTS $80,000 CAN BUY?

GO GREEN PROPOSAL

IF MEMORY SERVES, CRAPTAIN PINOCCHIO CENTNER, AFTER DUTIFULLY COUNTING ALL THE BEANS, HAS CLAIMED THAT THE SHERIFF EXPENDED MORE THAN $169,000 ON VEHICLE REPAIRS AND MAINTENANCE.  ADD FUEL COSTS TO THAT AND READERS WILL QUICKLY CONCLUDE THAT TAXPAYERS ARE HAVING A SIGNIFICANT AMOUNT OF THEIR TAX DOLLARS EXPENDED ON THIRD-RATE "SERVICES" (IF THAT IS THE PROPER TERM) FROM THE SHERIFF.  READERS NEED LOOK NO FURTHER THAN THE NO-INVESTIGATION INTO THE MURDER OF LAFAYETTE TOWNSHIP TRUSTEE BRYON MACRON, WHICH THESE MORONS HAVE UNSUCCESSFULLY TRIED TO PASS OFF AS A SUICIDE TO COVER UP POLITICAL INTRIGUE IN MEDINA COUNTY.

EVEN STEVIE WONDER CAN SEE THIS CRIME WAS NOT A SUICIDE!

WITH AN EYE TO FISCAL RESPONSIBILITY, THE BLOGGER OFFERS THE FOLLOWING GREEN ALTERNATIVE TO REPLACING HIGH-MILEAGE, GAS GUZZLERS WITH A FLEET OF SENSIBLE, ECO-FRIENDLY VEHICLES SUITED TO PERFECTLY MEET THE SHERIFF'S TRANSPORTATION NEEDS.

THE BASIC PATROL VEHICLE

SHOWN BELOW IS THE BASIC, NO-FRILLS PATROL VEHICLE TO BE ASSIGNED TO THE SHERIFF'S ROAD DIVISION, WITH A BASE PRICE RANGING FROM $355-$405.  TAXPAYERS WOULD LIKELY SEE A SIGNIFICANT VOLUME DISCOUNT ON THE PURCHASE OF 50 OR MORE REPLACEMENT PATROL VEHICLES!












THIS STUNNING BASIC PATROL VEHICLE IS STREET LEGAL, ELECTRICALLY OPERATED AND EQUIPPED WITH A HIGH PERFORMANCE 1,000 WATT, 250 CC ENGINE, PERFECT FOR PURSUING THOSE WAYWARD JUVENILES IN POSSESSION OF WEED, THE CREATION OF THE DEVIL!

THE BASIC PATROL VEHICLES WILL HAVE TO BE SELECTIVELY UPGRADED, HOWEVER, AT A SLIGHT UP CHARGE!  FOR EXAMPLE, THE HANDLEBARS WILL HAVE TO BE UPGRADED WITH RED COLORED EMERGENCY LIGHTING, SHOWN BELOW.




THE UPGRADE COST IS A MERE $2.44 (WITH FREE SHIPPING),  A REAL BARGAIN AT ANY WANNABE COP SHOP!  THIS NIFTY LITTLE NUMBER WILL GIVE FAIR WARNING TO DRIVERS TRAVELING AT LESS THAN 20 MPH TO CLEAR THE ROADWAY AND MAKE WAY FOR SHERIFF'S DE(PEW)TIES IN HOT PURSUIT OF THOSE JUVIES LITTERING THE COUNTY WITH CANDY BAR WRAPPERS.

HEAVY-DUTY SHOCKS WILL ALSO BE A REQUIRED UPGRADE.  THESE DE(PEW)TIES HAVE REALLY BEEN PACKING ON THE POUNDS WITH ALL THE DONUTS THEY'VE BEEN GOBBLING UP!

AN OPTIONAL CARGO CARRIER, SHOWN BELOW, IS A MANDATORY UPGRADE, SUFFICIENT TO TRANSPORT NO FEWER THAN A BAKER'S DOZEN (13) DUNKIN' DONUTS DONUTS OR 18 KRISPY KREMES!



AT A COST OF $59.95 - $89.95 PER COPY, SOME MIGHT THINK THIS UPGRADE IS A LITTLE PRICEY. AFTER SOME COST/BENEFIT ANALYSIS, HOWEVER, IT IS CLEAR THAT THIS MODEST INVESTMENT TURNS OUT TO BE A REAL MONEY SAVER.  INSTEAD OF MAKING A DONUT RUN TO DUNKIN' DONUTS TO RE-UP AFTER 2 OR 3 DONUTS ARE GONE, DE(PEW)TIES CAN SIMPLY REACH BACK INTO THE DUFFLE AND GORGE THEMSELVES ON ANOTHER FEW DONUTS WHILE ON PATROL AND BEFORE THE NEXT COFFEE & DONUT BREAK.

FINALLY, A LIMITED NUMBER OF BASIC PATROL VEHICLES WILL HAVE TO BE MODIFIED TO ACCOMMODATE THE NEEDS OF THE SHERIFF'S CHICKENSHIT SQUAD (SIMPLY KNOWN AMONG THEIR PEERS AS THE CHICKENSHITS) WHO ARE CHARGED WITH ENFORCING THE CHICKENSHIT ACT OF 2016 BY ROUNDING UP ALL THE ERRANT FREE RANGE CHICKENS ROAMING THE COUNTY. AN EASY IN, EASY OUT CAGE, SHOWN BELOW, FITTED TO THE BASIC PATROL VEHICLE WILL DO NICELY.
THESE BASIC, GREEN PATROL VEHICLES WILL MAKE A SUBSTANTIAL POSITIVE CONTRIBUTION TO SAVING THE PLANET!

BEAN COUNTER TRANSPORT (SPECIAL ORDER)

IT GOES WITHOUT SAYING THAT THE SHERIFF'S MAIN BEAN COUNTER, CRAPTAIN PINOCCHIO CENTER, CANNOT BE OVERLOOKED WHEN PLACING A NEW FLEET OF ECO-FRIENDLY VEHICLES INTO SERVICE. CRAPTAIN CENTNER, A DESK JOCKEY AND PENCIL PUSHER WHOSE ONLY HAZARDOUS DUTY IS BEING PLACED IN THE PATH OF AN ERRANT STAPLE FLYING ACROSS HIS DESK, CERTAINLY NEEDS THE COMFORT AND SECURITY OF HIDING BEHIND A DESK.  AFTER ALL, THOSE CHARGING HEREFORD CATTLE  CAN BE REALLY DANGEROUS WHEN STANDING BETWEEN THEM AND THE FEEDING TROUGH.

PRESENTED FOR READERS' CONSIDERATION IS A SPECIAL ORDER BEAN COUNTER TRANSPORT, WHICH, OF COURSE, WILL HAVE TO BE SPECIALLY ADAPTED FOR PINOCCHIO CENTER, THE BASIC MODEL SHOWN BELOW.  THE BASE MODEL IS ONLY A MODEST $525.00, A REAL BARGAIN TO ACCOMMODATE AN IMPORTANT PENCIL PUSHER LIKE CENTNER!


READERS WILL NOTE THE ERGONOMIC DESIGN.  A MESH BASKET AT THE FRONT OF THE VEHICLE WILL EASILY ACCOMMODATE TWO DOZEN DUNKIN' DONUTS OR THIRTY-SIX KRISPY KREME DONUTS.

READERS WILL NOTE, THAT EVEN TRAVELLING TO STAPLES TO PICK UP ANOTHER GROSS OF LEAD PENCILS, PINOCCHIO CENTNER WILL HAVE THE SENSUAL EXPERIENCE OF SITTING IN HIS PLUSH OFFICE CHAIR RIGHT BEHIND HIS OFFICE  DESK.  THE STANDARD BASKET WILL SURELY HOLD AT LEAST ONE FULL GROSS OF #2 LEAD PENCILS, ENOUGH TO LAST CENTNER FOR AT LEAST ONE MONTH.

SPECIAL UPGRADES WILL BE REQUIRED.  NO EMERGENCY LIGHTING WILL BE REQUIRED.  THE ONLY REAL EMERGENCY TO WHICH PINOCCHIO EVER RESPONDS IS A PAPER JAM IN THE OFFICE COPY MACHINE.

PINOCCHIO CENTNER'S BEAN COUNTER TRANSPORT WILL HAVE TO BE UPGRADED WITH AN AUTOMATIC PENCIL SHARPENER, SHOWN BELOW.

THIS IS A BARGAIN UPDATE AT AN UP CHARGE OF ONLY $20.99!  WITH THIS UPGRADE, CENTNER WILL HAVE NO FEAR OR ANXIETY OF BEING WITHOUT A SHARPENED PENCIL AT ALL TIMES.

ALSO, CENTNER'S BEAN COUNTER TRANSPORT MUST BE UPGRADED WITH AN INDESTRUCTIBLE STAINLESS STEEL PAIL SO AS TO PERMIT HIM TO CONTINUE COUNTING BEANS TO AND FROM DUNKIN' DONUTS. 



THE UP CHARGE FOR THE STAINLESS STEEL PAIL IS NEGLIGIBLE!

THE NEXT MANDATORY UPGRADE IS AN INDUSTRIAL GRADE BROOM TO PERMIT PINOCCHIO CENTNER TO SWEEP THE FACTS AND THE TRUTH UNDER THE RUG, A USUAL AND CUSTOMARY PRACTICE IN THE MEDINA COUNTY "JUSTUS" SYSTEM!




THE BLOGGER, OF COURSE, IS NOT REFERRING TO THE RECENT "PRESS" CONFERENCE RELATING TO THE HOMICIDE OF LAFAYETTE TOWNSHIP TRUSTEE BRYON MACRON.  PINOCCHIO CENTNER DIDN'T SWEEP ANY REAL FACTS UNDER THE RUG SIMPLY BECAUSE HE DID NOT HAVE ANY REAL AND TRUE FACTS TO BEGIN WITH!!!

TRUTH BE TOLD, THE MEDINA COUNTY SHERIFF CONCLUDED ON DECEMBER 16, 2016, THE DATE ON WHICH BRYON "DISAPPEARED," THAT BRYON HAD COMMITTED SUICIDE.  WHY BOTHER INVESTIGATING A "SUICIDE," SO THEY DIDN'T BOTHER!  WHAT A BUNCH OF COMPLETE MORONS WITH NO CHARACTER AND NO INTEGRITY.  KEYSTONE KOPS WITH THE UNFETTERED ABILITY TO SCREW UP EVEN THE MOST INNOCENT OF WET DREAMS!

LAST, BUT NOT LEAST, PINOCCHIO CENTNER'S BEAN COUNTER TRANSPORT MUST BE EQUIPPED WITH A BULLSHIT SPREADER TO BE USED IN ALL FUTURE "PRESS" CONFERENCES WHERE CENTNER ROUTINELY SPREADS IMPROBABLE UNADULTERATED BULLSHIT IN AN UNSUCCESSFUL ATTEMPT TO CONCEAL AND COVER UP THE COMPLETE INCOMPETENCE OF THE MEDINA COUNTY SHERIFF'S OFFICE WHERE CORRUPT POLITICIANS ARE THE TAIL THAT WAGS THE DOG.




WHILE $4,500 MIGHT SEEM TO BE AN EXORBITANT AMOUNT TO EXPEND FOR AN UPGRADE, FAR OUTSTRIPPING THE INITIAL INVESTMENT OF THE $525.00 BASE COST OF THE BEAN COUNTER TRANSPORT, THE READERS SHOULD TAKE INTO ACCOUNT THE SHEER VOLUME OF UNADULTERATED BULLSHIT THAT CRAPTAIN PINOCCHIO CENTNER THROWS AROUND DAILY!

SWAD VAN (SPECIAL WEAPONS AND DONUTS)

THERE ARE RARE OCCASIONS THAT THE MEDINA COUNTY SHERIFF IS REQUIRED TO MUSTER THE RESOURCES OF THE MEDINA COUNTY SWAD (SPECIAL WEAPONS AND DONUTS) TEAM.  ARRESTING ITINERANT MARAUDING AFRICAN AMERICAN MALES TRAVELING THOUGH THE COUNTY ON INTERSTATE 71 TYPICALLY CALLS FOR A RESPONSE FROM THE MEDINA COUNTY SWAD TEAM. 

THE PROPOSED SWAD VAN IS DEPICTED BELOW.


THE BASE PRICE OF OF THIS TURBO CHARGED 150 CC FOUR-STROKE ENGINE, ALTHOUGH NOT ELECTRICALLY OPERATED,  AT ONLY $800.00 IS MORE THAN REASONABLE. THE SWAD VAN IS CERTAINLY SUFFICIENTLY POWERFUL ENOUGH TO TRANSPORT THE ENTIRE SWAD TEAM TO RUSTLE A HERD OF CATTLE OUT OF THE COUNTY'S MANY RURAL ROADWAYS WITHOUT INORDINATE DELAY!

UNLIKE THE BEAN COUNTER TRANSPORT, THE SWAD VAN REQUIRES ONLY ONE UPGRADE, AN INDUSTRIAL BROOM (SHOWN ABOVE) TO SWEEP THE COW MANURE OFF THE ROADWAY.

THE SWAD VAN CAN PROPERLY BE INTEGRATED INTO THE FLEET AS A MULTI-PURPOSE VEHICLE, PERFECT FOR GROUP DONUTS RUNS TO DUNKIN' DONUTS BETWEEN EMERGENCY COW RUNS.

CENTRALLY LOCATED CHARGING STATIONS

WHILE SOME MIGHT QUESTION THE WISDOM OF RELYING UPON AN ALL-ELECTRIC FLEET OF SHERIFF'S SERVICE VEHICLES FOR WANT OF SUFFICIENT CHARGING STATIONS, THAT PROBLEM IS EASILY SOLVED.

THE COUNTY NEED ONLY INSTALL CHARGING STATIONS AT THE SHERIFF'S OFFICE, LOCATED IN PETTICOAT JUNCTION AND AT EVERY DONUT SHOP WITHIN THE BOUNDARIES OF MEDINA COUNTY.  CITIZENS CAN BE ASSURED THAT THE SHERIFF'S FLEET OF BASIC PATROL VEHICLES WILL BE FULLY CHARGED AT ALL TIMES.

IT IS FINALLY TIME FOR MEDINA COUNTY, LOCATED DEEP WITHIN THE LAWLESS LAKE ERIE BAYOU, TO TAKE A FIRST STEP INTO THE TWENTY-FIRST CENTURY WITH A MODEST INVESTMENT IN "GREEN" TECHNOLOGY!  READING LESSONS FOR SHERIFF'S PERSONNEL COME NEXT!